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Aug-30-2006 01:51

I heart stupidity. When you see it, post it here. I'll start.

Some of you know that I've do some teaching of first year sociology students in university. I really enjoy it, and love my students, but -GAWD- grading their work is a nightmare.

Through the course of a year, they have to write short essays on a range of topics ---feminism, Karl Marx, education, Freud, crime, etc. I feel kinda guilty laughing at these because of course they are writing under extreme pressure, but holy bobo I find them funny! Every so often, they write something so frickin' hysterical that it makes me gag laughing. These fleeting gems, I collect. Thought y'all might get a kick out of some of them.

Here we go. (nb, all typos and grammar boo boos are theirs from here on, not mine)

"Education is not really as old as many people think. It all came about in
the 1960s when the Russians were more advanced with outerspace."

"There is no evidence of women in society until the late 1990s"

"Freud is the classic theory of gender he believes the boy has the penis the girl has the clitoris simple as that"

"Freud said that a boy who plays too many dolls might be a p_ssy in later life"

"Feminists think women are the lowest of the low"

"Education is bias it only works for children who come from families where the parents are rich white and male"

"Hitlar believed in the destroying the Jews, however, his dictation only lasted until he was alive, after it was forgotten."

"Weber saw society from his eyes"

"someone from the low class is no good to us. we don't see them as nonsuccessful. That is because of sociology"

"Max Weber is a known and accredited sociologist"

"All around us in our society it is, said to be all around us these 'bureacracy' for example God is higher than Jeesus. The boss."

Sep-7-2006 04:53

I work in a translation company that translates form Arabic to English. Since i am the copyeditor, i get all sorts of nonsense. Crunch, this is a great place for me to share my pain! .... Waiting for the next nonsnse sentence to show up...

Sep-7-2006 22:57

I've got a beautiful one...

A drunk sorority-type woman decides to sing "Hollaback Girl" by Gwen Stefani one night at one of my shows. So she gets into it, gyrating drunkenly, and actually getting some words right in between her mumbling and shouting. Anyway, for those of you that don't know, there's a bridge to the song where Gwen sings "This *bleep* is bananas, B-A-N-A-N-A-S" repeatedly. So the song ends, and she turns over to me and in the most sincere face I have ever seen on a drunk woman, exclaims:

"I never knew what that spelled before!"

Better spelling through karaoke, people...

Sep-8-2006 01:05

LMAO yeah sleuthville y'all bringing the stupid like I knew you could! This *bleep* is S-T-U-P-I-D, yo.

Ranier: You're killing me! When I was a little kid, my family used to rent a cottage in an area that happened to be popular with folks from Michigan as well. I kid you not when I tell you that one of these guys asked me if dogs are allowed in Canada. Because he worked at the dog food plant -guess he wondered where his dehydrated turkey giblets were going or something. Plus the Niagara Falls thing - I have lots of family around there, so I know it's crazy to begin with...any money spent on Clifton Hill might eventually end up in my pocket, so, like WORK HARDER dammit!

Tinuviel: I need my daily stupid, so I'm hoping you get someone who thinks that 'Chokeran' is Arabic for "can I puke here?". Please do share the nonsense.

Squirrel: okay that's so stupid it's hedging on unfair. Like 'stupid steroids' unfair. What was he served when he ordered the Mitsubishi? Three diamonds, steaming hot on the hood of a toyota?

Sep-8-2006 14:44

an exchange student came to our high school, and one of my class mates asked him where he was from. After he replied, "Germany", she asked him, "so if you're german, what language do they speak there?"

i was on a cruise on the Pacific Ocean and my brother and i were sitting in our room looking at the water line that was just below our window. He looks up quizzically and asks me, "so...what altitude do you think we are at?"

Sep-10-2006 19:27

Ok, today's sentences:

It is well-known for my friends and intimates,..

I see that inter-religion tolerance is the real genius to maintain life on planet Earth.

Nevertheless, this will never bring back our deaths or rebuild our destruction.

Experience shows that using oil may horrify consumers.
However, in the long term, this may open up an opportunity for the buyers to dispose of it.

And misfortunes always come together.

Indeed, they do! Stay tuned in for more! :)

Sep-14-2006 00:34

someone who turns on their blinker expressly to change lanes, then forgets about it (how do you do that in the time it takes to change lanes?) and proceeds to drive an entire two or three miles with it flashing (like a bright red sign reading, ''Hey, I'm stupid!!''), and it only turns off when they actually make a right turn...

*bangs head against computer*

Sep-14-2006 01:25

I have a few from my Middle Schoolers, too. Equally hilarious, and sadly, equally true.

Sometimes, though, you get one that gives a whole new perspective. This is from a book report: "Maid Marian was in love with Robin Hood. Robin Hood was too." ;)

Sep-14-2006 01:43

Well you don't wear tights in the middle of an English Winter without having a great deal of confidence and some sort of masochsitic self-fascination!

Sep-14-2006 03:07

LOL--how true! This is the same class that believes that Richard was imprisoned by Leopold of Australia and the Feudal System was a great-named bar for knights. :D

Sep-14-2006 11:50

So I am hired all the time to script doctor. That is, someone writes a screenplay or television script that they eventually want to pitch and sell to networks or producers, they hire me BEFORE they do that to make sure that their script is ready for prime time.

So recently I was hired by a group of newbie writers who are trying to craft a television pilot. After reviewing their script, I instructed them that television show scripts have multiple plot lines running through them, the primary plot line or the A Plot, and the secondary plot line or the B plot, and sometimes a third plot line, the C plot. But theirs only had one plot running through it, making it more like a short film project with a television script feel -- in other words it wasn't dramatic enough and the stakes weren't high enough for it to succeed as a film, but it was structured incorrectly to be a professional television script.

I then spent 30 minutes instructing them how to properly construct the A,B, and if they desired, C plot to ensure that their script was in the correct professional format.

Their response: Well, if EVERYBODY is doing an A and B plot then if we only do an A plot then our script will be Cutting Edge!!

My response: I advise strongly against that, but as long as you cut me my check, you can do whatever you want.