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DaRu
DaRu
Well-Connected

Jul-2-2005 11:10

"A polite way in saying someone is dumb."

1) A few clown short of a circus.
2) A few fries short of a happy meal.
3) A few beers short of a six-pack.
4) Doesn't have all cornflakes in one box.
5) The wheels are spinning, but he hampster's dead.
6) One Froot Loop short of a full bowl.
7) One taco short of a combo plate.
8) A few feathers short of a whole duck.
9) All foam and no beer.
10) Body by Fisher Price and brains by Mattel.
11) Couldn't put water out of a boot even with the instructions on the heel.
12) Chimmey's clogged.
13) Doesn't have all his dogs on a leash.
14) Elevator doesn't go all the way up to the top floor.
15) Her sewing machine is out of thread.
16) His antenna doesn't pick up all the channels.
17) Missing a few buttons on his remote control.
18) Reciever is off the hook.
19) Too much yardage between the goal posts
20) Skylight leaks alittle.
21) The light is on but nobody is home



Replies

AndreaX
AndreaX
Thespian

Dec-30-2006 13:11

Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach a person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks.


Adam Carter
Adam Carter
Big Winner

Dec-30-2006 15:07

Why don't cannibals eat comedians?

Because they taste funny.

Secret_Squirrel
Secret_Squirrel
Safety Officer

Dec-30-2006 18:00

ergh A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says, 'So, why the long face...'

A guy with jumper cables walks into the bar. The bartender says, 'You can come in, just don't start anything'.

A kangaroo walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender says 'That'll be $10, but you know we don't get many kangaroo's coming in here'. Kangaroo looks at him and says, 'At these prices it's not surprising'.

A grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartenders says 'Hey we've got a drink named after you'. The grasshopper says, 'What, you've got a drink named George'?

biggie528
biggie528
Lucky Stiff

Dec-30-2006 18:23

A guy walks into a bar and says ouch

Ima Vagabond
Ima Vagabond
Safety Officer

Dec-30-2006 18:58

A dyslexic walks into a bra...

crunchpatty
crunchpatty
Old Shoe

Jan-3-2007 02:33

lol!

Q: what do you get when you cross a dyslexic, a philosopher and an insomniac?

A: someone who stays up all night contemplating the meaning of dog...

Also:

What's green, fuzzy and might kill you if it lands on you from a tall tree?

A pool table.

*still digging the sleevies thing*



biggie528
biggie528
Lucky Stiff

Jan-3-2007 06:03

Whats green, blade shaped and on wheels?

Grass...I lied about the wheels.

(yes thats one of my friend's kids favorite)

Adam Carter
Adam Carter
Big Winner

Jan-3-2007 06:25

Three guys are in a bar on the top of a cliff. The first guy says to the other guys "You know, if had just one more beer, I think I could fly." The second guy says "No Way!" So the first guy orders a beer and drinks it. Then all three guys walk out to the edge of the cliff. The first guy jumps off, starts falling to the ground, and then flies back to the top of the cliff.
The second guy is totally amazed, so he says "You know, if I had another beer, I bet I could do that too." So all three guys go into the bar, and the second guy has another beer. After he finished, he said "Ok, I will be able to fly now" So they all went outside and the second guy jumped off of the cliff and fell to the bottom, where he hit the ground and died instantly. The third guy turned to the first guy and said "You know Superman, you are a real jerk when you drink"

Sara Lou
Sara Lou

Jan-3-2007 06:33

OMG ADAM! That rocks! SICLMAO!!

A priest, a rabbi, and a monk walk into a bar and the bartender says , " Is this a joke?"

A priest, a rabbi, and a monk are in a boat when the priest says, "I'm thirsty." So he gets outta the boat walks acrosss the water to the cooler on the shore, and then walks back with a pop from the cooler.

A while later the rabbi says, "I'm thirsty now." So he gets outta the boat walks acrosss the water to the cooler on the shore, and then walks back with a water from the cooler.

Awhile later, the monk says, "You know, now I'm thirsty." He steps outta the boat and sinks. The priest turns to the rabbi and says, "Do you think we shoulda told him where the rocks are?"

Jonathan Williams
Jonathan Williams

Jan-3-2007 06:52

A young man comes into the doctors and says, "Doc, is it hereditary to lose your memory?" "No," the doctor replies, "Why?" "Well," the man says, "both of my parents are. For example, one day my mother wanted some Ice Cream, so she went out to get so me. But my father stopped her, telling her that he would get some. 'Alright,' she said, 'I'll write it down'. 'no', he says, 'just tell me, I won't forget'. 'Okay', she says, 'I want some vanilla ice cream in a cone'. 'Okay', he says. He leaves, come s back half an hour later, gives his wife a bag. "What!" she scrams. "This is a cheeseburger, you idiot! I wanted a hamburger!"

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