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CONTEST: There Once Was a Gumshoe in Sleuth...
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Dec-10-2007 00:33

Yeah, the limerick sure is an art form. Is it YOUR art form? Show us!

Yes, it's the Sleuth Limerick contest. Let's get all the icky rule stuff out of the way.

* Limerick should be about Sleuth Noir OR a murder mystery OR about a detective or crime.

* You can put in as many entries as you like :)

* Entries must follow standard limerick rhythm and rhyming patterns (see example below)

* Limericks are usually, historically speaking, vulgar. Let's not go that route in this contest, thanks.

* Spelling counts, etc. As always.

* Entries must be posted by 11:59 PM server time on December 31, 2007

There are prizes to be had!! Happy, happy prizes, all waiting for YOU, yes, YOU! to win them.

* Subscribed winner(s) will receive Sleuthcash. Yay, sleuthcash! Who wants to be a millionaire? YOU DO! (okay, just for the record, I'm not giving away a million dollars in Sleuthcash - more like $100,000)
* Unsubscribed winner(s) will receive a one month gift subscription and $50,000 Sleuthcash. WOOT!


This example was written by that famous author, Anonymous. Okay, fine, I wrote it. :-P

There once was a tough but smart chump
Whose client was charmingly plump,
He tracked down the killer -
T'was Thomas, the miller!
Thus breaking his false accuse slump.

If you need more information about the rhythm, try this (ripped right from Wikipedia): "There WAS a young MAN from the COAST;" "There ONCE was a GIRL from DeTROIT..."

Basically, syllable-wise, 8,8,6,6,8 with a rhyme scheme of A,A,B,B,A


Gopher to the Sleuth Gods

Dec-19-2007 15:33

I have a monkey on my back,
An addiction I rather enjoy.
I meet great people,
Solve some crimes,
My brain is finally employed!

Rock Josie Johnson
Rock Josie Johnson

Dec-20-2007 03:44

Police are always on the chase,
Hand-cuffing villians face-to-face,
Putting them behind bars,
Wishing they had cigars,
Now the police are done with their case.

Now just to say, I've never done limerick before. I hope this is good.

Y'all can call me Bucky
Y'all can call me Bucky

Dec-20-2007 05:17

Ol’ Bucky aint much for no fancy literary pursuits, but danged ifn I don’t know a limerick or two. My Granpappy used to sit me on his knee and tell me some might funny one’s ‘bout ladies from Connecticut and such, but I will try and do some composing of mah own…

In a place where the hills meets them flats,
Lives Bucky (and Missy and brats)
He was kinda a sleuth,
Coz he still wanted proof
Why cows shouldn’t get to wear hats.

That there is dedicated to our best milkin cow Shirlene, on accounta some folk saying she aint got no right to no headwear. Me I don’t reckon so. Why ifn she don’t have a hat, then that there dress she’s wearin is gonna look a might foolish.

Y'all can call me Bucky.

Safety Officer

Dec-21-2007 04:57

There once was a man from New York,
Died eating a large plate of pork
Cried the Sleuth, 'He's not Jewish,
And his face is quite bluish,
Perhaps he just swallowed his fork'?

Gee that was bad...

A Sleuth who'd drunk deep, and was boozed,
Got his holster and fly quite confused
When chasing a thief
He shouted good grief
That's not my gun that I've used.

Boom Boom. Ok, it's late and that's funny 'now'...

Sleuth About Town

Dec-21-2007 23:07


There once was a lass from Moon Bay,
Who was killed, at noon, on a Sunday,
Though the villain was deft,
Seems a thread he had left,
And that helped me to catch him on Monday.

Tireless Tiger

Dec-22-2007 08:30

There once was a detective name squirrel
Whose limericks would make your hair curl
They were meant to be funny
And were right on the money
Time for me to give it a whirl

Safety Officer

Dec-22-2007 20:08

On the steps of the Station, quite late,
A perp' was left cuffed and irate,
'This guy aint quite right'
Said the cop on that night,
'All he'll say is, 'ctown28'.

[I admit squirrel is harder to rhyme than eight :)]

Sleuth About Town

Dec-23-2007 22:23

There once was a cad called ctown,
Who was drinking the whiskey straight down,
Squirrel told him to quit ,
'fore he lost all his wit,
and starts dancing around in a gown. (again)

Safety Officer

Dec-24-2007 00:41

hey you've seen the pictures too brick! *shudders*

Safety Officer

Dec-24-2007 00:44

A Sleuth entered a contest one day
A limerick was needed to play
Though try as he might
To get the thing right,
He decided it was just easier to go off and read a book, have a cup of coffee and maybe finish wrapping the Christmas presents that aren't wrapping themselves you know...

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