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The quotable...
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crunchpatty
Old Shoe
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Feb-4-2007 23:55
The quotable missus, during the final quarter of the Super Bowl:
"Don't talk to me like I'm stupid, I get it so shut up. This is the last down, and a down is like a chance. If they don't move ten yards in the direction they want to go in four chances they lose possession of the ball. There a four quarters in a game. Stop laughing; you're laughing at me. Shut up. How many downs til they get the new quarterback? Oh that man caught the ball even though he wasn't a Chicago player, now he's running the other way. I think Indianapolis will win this game."
*will let this settle before he complicates things with CFL rules*
heard anything quotable lately?
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bam_punk
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Apr-4-2007 17:06
Me and me friends
¤¤¤¤¤
Me: (to Erin) Hi, Erin!....I kicked you! Hahaha.
Erin: (happily) Hi, Jenna!
Me: (to Ryan) You know what, I'll kick you too.
Ryan: (in a strange voice) NO, JENNA! DON'T KICK ME!!!
¤¤¤¤¤
I don't know, I just wanted to post something so I posted this.... weird thingy.
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bam_punk
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Apr-4-2007 17:07
^happened today after school^
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crunchpatty
Old Shoe
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Apr-21-2007 02:07
okay. http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/ is more what I'm looking for though.
Stoned grocery stockboy #1: Hey, should I put these sandwiches with the other sandwiches?
Stoned grocery stockboy #2: Look at what's in your hands. That's mexican dip you idiot! Ain't even no bread.
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Anikka
Babelfish
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Apr-21-2007 10:44
Overheard in Crunchpatty's little home office: (yes, it's bugged)
*loud snickers and giggles*
This'll be so great! I'll post about two stoned stockboys...
*more giggles*
...and they'll never know that Stoned stockboy #1 was me!!!!
*more giggles, some coughing, and a gurgle*
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crunchpatty
Old Shoe
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May-17-2007 23:26
OK for the record I have never been a stoned stockboy.
Stoned barista? Sure. Stoned student? Yuh-huhbsolutely. Stoned 7-11 iced cream thief? lol, duuuuuude, 7+ 11 TOTALLY makes 18, and that TOTALLY rhymes with iced cream.
Whoa. Did you just, like, jingle your keys, or is that a siren I hear?
The quotable Mormons on their rite-of-passage mission on the subway:
Elder Harris (aka crew cut guy#1): Hello miss. We're here to spread the new gospel of Jesus Christ. We'd like to come to your home to do a presentation about what accepting the Lord can do for your family. Do you go to church at all?
Asian (ethnicity is relevant here) woman: *Blank stare*.
Elder Johannsen: Do you go to a Chinese church?
Asian woman: *dirty look*
Elder Harris: *speaking very slowly* Do...you..speak...eng...lish? Our church has lots of Chinese members in Toronto; we can arrange for the presentation to be in Chinese. Do you speak Mandarin or Cantonese?
Asian woman: I'm Korean you a**hole.
BURN!
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Jonny
Well-Connected
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Jun-8-2007 11:50
My quotable brother on the subject to TV:
"Before they had colour TV's, was everyone in black and white?"
The scariest thing is he's just finished school...
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Ms Helen
Con Artist
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Jun-8-2007 13:36
The quotable 'likes to think he knows it all' chef from where i used to work:
Me: We have a vegan in Jon, what can you do for her?
Jon: Does it have to come from the vegetarian menu or can she have meat?
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crunchpatty
Old Shoe
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Jun-9-2007 01:57
Stupid chef...vegans ONLY eat meat, like d'urrrr gosh!
Jonny: leave...home...now. Or, really screw with said sibling by buying him a black n' white TV and getting nuts with the screen with a pack of flourescent highlighters when he's not looking.
The quotable first time in a chinese restaurant American tourist guy: Are your spring rolls available in the summer?
Waiter: *three second pause while e thinks about his tip* Yes sir, we still have them.
Guy: I thought it was always winter in Canada. I'll take six, but I want them before the duck.
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crunchpatty
Old Shoe
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Oct-19-2007 00:20
The quotable random young woman in front of my house, which is CLEARLY a house, the other day:
Her: Hi. Can I ask you a question?
Me: Sure.
Her: So, is this like an apartment, or a building?
Me: It's a house.
Her: That's so nice! Thanks a lot!
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Anikka
Babelfish
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Oct-19-2007 16:51
You're a magnet, Crunchman. A Magnet.
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