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CONTEST: There Once Was a Gumshoe in Sleuth...
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Dec-10-2007 00:33

Yeah, the limerick sure is an art form. Is it YOUR art form? Show us!

Yes, it's the Sleuth Limerick contest. Let's get all the icky rule stuff out of the way.

* Limerick should be about Sleuth Noir OR a murder mystery OR about a detective or crime.

* You can put in as many entries as you like :)

* Entries must follow standard limerick rhythm and rhyming patterns (see example below)

* Limericks are usually, historically speaking, vulgar. Let's not go that route in this contest, thanks.

* Spelling counts, etc. As always.

* Entries must be posted by 11:59 PM server time on December 31, 2007

There are prizes to be had!! Happy, happy prizes, all waiting for YOU, yes, YOU! to win them.

* Subscribed winner(s) will receive Sleuthcash. Yay, sleuthcash! Who wants to be a millionaire? YOU DO! (okay, just for the record, I'm not giving away a million dollars in Sleuthcash - more like $100,000)
* Unsubscribed winner(s) will receive a one month gift subscription and $50,000 Sleuthcash. WOOT!


This example was written by that famous author, Anonymous. Okay, fine, I wrote it. :-P

There once was a tough but smart chump
Whose client was charmingly plump,
He tracked down the killer -
T'was Thomas, the miller!
Thus breaking his false accuse slump.

If you need more information about the rhythm, try this (ripped right from Wikipedia): "There WAS a young MAN from the COAST;" "There ONCE was a GIRL from DeTROIT..."

Basically, syllable-wise, 8,8,6,6,8 with a rhyme scheme of A,A,B,B,A


Kevin Greene
Kevin Greene
Old Shoe

Dec-12-2007 10:16

I hop it can be a string of Limericks! Here's my entry. :-)

There once was a Dutchman named Kees,
Who’s body lay outside to freeze,
I’m hired by a friend,
The were friends ‘til the end
Which came round in a wheel of cheese.

It was that Drew the cheese maker
Was in trouble with the baker.
So into the vat he poured
Cleaning lye which assured
The death of his money taker.

The baker had threatened to tell
Something that would make Drew’s life hell.
The cheese maker argued,
But blackmail still ensued,
And for Kees, all would not be well.

Sleuth About Town

Dec-12-2007 16:47

There once was a man named O'Rouke,
who died by a dirty steak fork;
I was needing a hint,
Then I found the thread lint.
I guess this bloke should have had pork.

Safety Officer

Dec-13-2007 02:12

There once was a sleuth from Nantucket

Hey I had to at least try...

There once was a sleuth from Nantucket,
Who found evidence sealed in a bucket.
It was truly a mess!
A head... more or less,
And when it slipped from his grasp he said... Ffffffor goodness sake, aren't I a silly butter-fingers.


Dec-13-2007 04:14

There once was a ghost known as Fred
A Sleuth was called when he was dead
With his killer in jail
His dread spirit did wail
"But I slid and fell in my shed."

Sleuth About Town

Dec-13-2007 09:55

There once was a Sleuth named Nona,
She lay dead near an iguana,
Her killer ran amok,
Wishing all a good luck,
She doesn't lie near Botswana.

Gopher to the Sleuth Gods

Dec-13-2007 10:33

The detective had run out of cases
This caused her to make funny faces. :-(
When a treasue hunt arose
She put up her toes
And watched her comrades chase down evidence traces.

Phoenix Shadow
Phoenix Shadow
Sleuth About Town

Dec-14-2007 10:16

There once was a sleuth from Bombay,
Who caught a foul villain one day.
He was locked up in chains;
The key thrown down the drain;
It's quite clear that crime doesn't pay.


Dec-17-2007 14:05

My client was named Antoinette
She was killed with a bayonet
I said with a sigh
And sat down to cry
"She hadn't paid me my fee yet."

Ob Sidian
Ob Sidian

Dec-17-2007 17:23

Boom, boom the blast ripped through the air,
Rapunzle ducked but was strangled by her hair.
Now she’s dead and the shooter escaped,
Detective Smartask will set it straight.
With no agency help, tracking is no fair.

The case is really hard, so they say,
It’s worth 160 exp points Smartask won’t delay.
A knife and gun she is very tough,
Interrogate until they yell enough, enough.
Bad man caught, today is a good day.


Dec-18-2007 12:15

Wow, you all are coming up with some good ones (and a huge ROFL to SS). :-D

I do need to clarify something, however - the Limerick is more about the rhythm than it is about the syllables - the syllables are changeable as long as the rhythm is there.

The rhyme scheme, on the other hand, is mostly firm. I say mostly, because with Secret Squirrel's as an example, this type of unexpected ending is acceptable. That doesn't mean you should all go out and try to make one like that; let's try for basic limericks that rhyme properly and not get all fancy-schmancy -- unless you're really good at it and want to put in a sample.


There ONCE was a GIRL from KilKARney...

is as acceptable as

There ONCE was a GIRL from ConNECTicut...

... neither of which have eight syllables, but if you say them aloud, stressing the words or word sections that are capitalised, hopefully any questions about the rhythm will be answered. Just remember that lines 1, 2, and 5 should all have the same rhythm, and lines 3 and 4 should match each other but be shorter than 1, 3, and 5.

If this doesn't clarify, send me a PM. To everyone who has struggled to match the number of syllables, I do apologise. Please feel free to rewrite and resubmit them, or to submit new ones, or to send me a PM telling me I'm clear as mud (which won't be anything I don't already know).

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