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Jun-7-2005 08:09

i was out of town this past weekend on a church outing. I had ben talking to my best friend about her choices and she chose drugs over jesus like the song . i came home to a dead best friend. do any of ya'll know anything to help take my mind off of it? what is ya'lls thoughts on suicide?

Jun-7-2005 09:58

I am so sorry, this is very very very tough. Though I do not regard myself expert on this matter, I have in the past year lost 2 good friends to suicide. And have struggled with accepting their choices. This is a tad bit personal to me, but as I know how it feels, maybe I can save you a bit of trouble around this. I agree with CFM, if this turns in to an issue that is more then simply the loss of a friend, I suggest you do talk to an expert. We spend a lot of money, taking care of our bodies in the beauty parlor and the gym and clothes. Like our bodies are brains need maintenance ever so often as well. (And this coming from someone who was dead set against therapy, and always said...it is not for me.) The reason why CFM is so dead in what she says, I held in grief (and anger) for many years. And I have seen what it can do to you.

First all.
1. The choice your friend made is her own. There is nothing you could have done. This is because the decision to suicide is such a big one, so big, that there is nothing you could have done.
2. It is hard to understand why someone makes a decision like that. This is in a way a good thing. The thing is someone who makes this type of decision, as something in their head that they can not escape. Call it a thought process, that is wrong to start with. For whatever reason that may be mental illness, drugs or whatever. It is this thought process, that tells them...this is the best choice.
3. I used to think suicide was a really sellfish act. Now that I have seen people do it. I have changed my thinking in this. In what I explained under number 2, in their weighing of pro's and con's in their mind that is sick they have considered other people. But came up with the conclusion everybody would be better off.
4. Seek comfort that your friend is with the angels, in a better place then on earth where they were so tormented. Tormented so badly point, that they were willing to commit the one thing that against the biggest force that

Jun-7-2005 10:00

is within all of us...which is to survive. She could no longer survive.
5. Some religions say that suicide is bad. But the god embraces every one of us. And could have facilitated her choice. he takes people for mysterious reasons. That are not up to us to question.

Hang in there. And I am sorry.

Jun-7-2005 10:16

thanks everyone the only person she wrote a note to was myself. and in it she asked for me to take her son and raise him as if she would have. i am now the only person jameson has here.

Jun-7-2005 10:20

i am so scared but yall helped me to realize what i have been telling others for years. God knows what he is doing now do i have the courage to let him do it his way or am i selfish?

Jun-7-2005 11:12

Wow...hearing that, brought tears to my eyes! I have complete compassion for you and all I can say is, God love ya girl! We don't know each other but if you need anyone to talk to, know that I am always available, even if it's just to listen :) I may not ever give good advice,but I've always been known to listen well and offer support by just caring enough to listen :)

I'm not a religious expert or dont preach it but put it all in God's hands, and let Him guide you through this....He won't let you down and He is the best support system anyone could ever have.

Hope I didn't offend anyone by saying that!

Anyways, hang in there hon!

Jun-7-2005 17:27

Oh my gosh, Angel. My prayers are with you... I know you're going through a really hard time, so I won't say much but I will say these three words: I'm so sorry.

Jun-7-2005 18:46

i am really sorry to hear about your friend angel. that is a hard thing to go through. i know you don't know me, but i want you to know that i will be keeping you in my prayers as you go through this time. reach out to the friends and family around you they will help you to heal. God has given us them to help us and support us, don't hold everything in it will only hurt worse. let God help you to heal, He wants to be there and He can handle all of your feelings.
i am glad that you are going to be able to help with raising her son,he is going to need a lot of love and stability.
May God ease your pain.

Jun-8-2005 11:35

I'm so sorry about about your friend and all it will put you though. jstkdn is right when she said: The thing is someone who makes this type of decision, as something in their head that they can not escape. Call it a thought process, that is wrong to start with. For whatever reason that may be mental illness, drugs or whatever. It is this thought process, that tells them...this is the best choice.
I hope this isn't offensive and I only want o help with a firend of my did the same this helped me alot. Its a quote from Bruce R. McConkie.
“Suicide consists in the voluntary and intentional taking of one’s own life, particularly where the person involved is accountable and has a sound mind. … Persons subject to great stresses may lose control of themselves and become mentally clouded to the point that they are no longer accountable for their acts. Such are not to be condemned for taking their own lives. It should also be remembered that judgment is the Lord’s; he knows the thoughts, intents, and abilities of men; and he in his infinite wisdom will make all things right in due course.”
I feel that judgment for sin is not always as cut-and-dried as some of us seem to think. Plus its not over your friend, she is still learning and trying to understand. Really, only the Lord will be able to administer fair judgment. He alone has all the facts, and only He would know the intent of the your friend's heart.
My prayers are with you. You're not alone in this.

Jun-8-2005 12:28

My prayers are with you.

Jun-8-2005 23:26

Angel,
Several people on here have mentioned that you shouldn't try to go through this alone. You have already made steps in this direction by sharing with us and asking for our prayers. I think P. Rockwell is right:

"Persons subject to great stresses may lose control of themselves and become mentally clouded to the point that they are no longer accountable for their acts. Such are not to be condemned for taking their own lives. It should also be remembered that judgment is the Lord’s; he knows the thoughts, intents, and abilities of men; and he in his infinite wisdom will make all things right in due course.”
This is in God's control, He will be with you through this and will support you in raising her son. It is a complement to your character that she chose you to write a note to and especially that she wanted you to raise her son. Have the faith in yourself that she did. Know that we are here for you and will help in any way possible. You are in my prayers,
Yours in Christ,
Amber