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The Annual Sleuth Beauty Pageant 2009
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Molly Maltese
Molly Maltese
Old Shoe

Nov-11-2009 19:36

"(to be sung softly and slowly, with solemnity)
From street to penthouse suite, master of mystery
She dusts everything she sees
She aces every case
She’s boss at the Arch Villain chase
She’s got a nice enough face.
She is…Miss Sleuthvilleeeeee
Hold your fedora up high
Hold your fedora up high
Raise it to the sky
Hold your fedora up high
Woaaa yeye oooh ye sky high, hold your fedora up high..."

(adapted from William Shatner's "Miss United States" from the hit movie, Miss Congeniality.)

(NOTE: These lyrics in no way imply that no males can enter the beauty pageant, but putting "he/she/it" everywhere necessary in the song would reeeeally diminish the effect of the poetic masterpiece before you.
Males are welcome and are encouraged!)

Welcome to the revival of the Annual Sleuth Beauty Pageant that I have hastily undertaken.

It's time to whip out your curling irons, your fake eyelashes, your obscene amounts of gel, your lipstick and most importantly your cameras, or perhaps just your knowledge of movie stars or notable public figures of Hollywood's Golden Age and school us folks at Sleuth in just what a beautiful avatar is! Or, you could skip the theme and just snap a pic of yourself. That too, we certainly understand. PLEASE NOTE: ONCE THE CONTEST BEGINS AND YOU ARE NOMINATED, YOU ARE NOT PERMITTED TO CHANGE YOUR AVATAR FOR THE DURATION OF THE CONTEST. FAILURE TO COMPLY WILL RESULT IN YOUR REMOVAL FROM THE RUNNING.

Here's how this is going to work. Consider this a warning post: if you think there's a chance you might be nominated, we suggest you change your avatar to its most flattering aspect possible. Currently nominations will be accepted once the judges are found and Ben is supplicated in earnest for his blessing.

As of right now, nominations are not being accepted! If you post one I shall smite thee. I will post as soon as I have full clearance to start and you can nominate to your hearts content. Good luck!

Message me if you are confused on anything above


Molly Maltese
Molly Maltese
Old Shoe

Nov-19-2009 00:34

Because of the sheer numbers, I'm withdrawing from the running. Best of luck everybody! :D

Elizabeth Christie
Elizabeth Christie
Tireless Tiger

Nov-19-2009 09:07

Molly you just withdrew because the urge to change your picture daily was just too much to handle!! ;)

Molly Maltese
Molly Maltese
Old Shoe

Nov-19-2009 09:39

That too. ;D

Molly Maltese
Molly Maltese
Old Shoe

Nov-19-2009 09:45

Well now I have to 'splain. See, that picture is Olive Borden, who was really famous in the 20's and 30's. But by the time she hit 40, she was absolutely destitute, living in a womens shelter in skid row of LA. She died of pneumonia there, with the only person at her side her mother, and the only possession she had an old signed picture of herself.

Annnd I couldn't wait to change it because I visited her grave yesterday.

PLUS, there are so many purdy people in this contest I couldn't hope to win! ^_^

Lady Zeugirdor
Lady Zeugirdor
Pinball Amateur

Nov-19-2009 12:29

I nominate Caledonia.

Molly Maltese
Molly Maltese
Old Shoe

Nov-20-2009 21:45

*saunters to forefront of stage in extravagant red sequin gown*

Dahlings! DAAAAAHLINGS! Welcome to our first event this evening! You all look lovely, but not half as lovely as those glorious gents and dazzling dames on our lengthy list of nominees. Would you like to hear all about them? In no particular order, the nominations are:

Anais Nin
Molly Maltese
Riza Hawkeye
Heimlich Von Victor
The Contessa
Gracie Lou
Vampiria Dragonis
Violet Parr
Clift Garrett
Charlie Cain
Marc Lacrimosa
Lady Jas
Elizabeth March
Ms. Helen
Elizabeth Christie
William Barrington-Ward
Lady Zuergidor
Agent Canady
Dawn Dragon
Dick Grayson
Sleuth Sindy
Mai Capome
Sleuthgirl Ciara
Secret_Squirrel and his sexy moustache

Quite a list, huh? Our judges, the marvelously moustachioed Secret Squirrel, the charming Ctown28 and the lovely Lady Jas have their work cut out for them! Marc Lacrimosa will be breaking a tie in the event of such a situation, and the list of 10 finalists they narrow this down to will be put on a public poll to decide who will be crowned Mr./Mrs./Genderless Nonentity Sleuthville! Best of luck to all of you!

*wafts cigarette smoke and struts around, posing and blowing kisses as lights fade. An OMNISCIENT VOICE is heard*

OMNISCIENT VOICE: Judges! Your task, should you so choose it, and you will, because I am omniscient and command thee, etc etc, is to rank your top 12 out of all the contestants avatars! You will then submit your list numbered from 1-12 to the Contest Master, Molly Maltese, who will tally up each spots numerical value (ex. Contestant Dick Cheney is ranked 12 by Judge 1, 4 by Judge 2 and 7 by Judge 3, giving him an over-all score of 23. Those 10 with the highest scores will be going on the Sleuth poll and are granted bragging rights, etc etc.
As always, PM with questions or concerns.

Molly Maltese
Molly Maltese
Old Shoe

Nov-20-2009 22:10

Nominees Link Index:

Anais Nin-

Riza Hawkeye-





Heimlich Von Victor-


The Contessa-

Gracie Lou-

Vampiria Dragonis-

Violet Parr-

Clift Garrett-

Charlie Cain-

M. Lacrimosa-

Lady Jas-

Elizabeth March-



Ms. Helen-


Elizabeth Christie-

William Barrington-Ward-

Lady Zuergidor-


Agent Canady-


Molly Maltese
Molly Maltese
Old Shoe

Nov-20-2009 22:16

Dawn Dragon-

Dick Grayson-

Sleuth Sindy-

Mai Capome-


Sleuthgirl Ciara-


Caledonia -

Phew. That took forever. I should get a crown just for that! ;D

Molly Maltese
Molly Maltese
Old Shoe

Nov-21-2009 13:04

It has been brought to my attention that I ABSOLUTELY FAIL AS A CONTEST MASTER. D: Go ahead, lynch me!

I'm soooooo sorry to Joseph Zeo, Aknas and miss snopes! I missed this post, undoubtedly still laughing about the "anticipation" bit.

Violet Parr
[Post History]
Nov-16-2009 11:09
I'm nominating Aknas, Joseph Zeo & Miss Snopes!

:,[ :,[ :,[ *gets out duct-tape to fix problem*

Lady Jas
Lady Jas
The Chosen One

Nov-21-2009 13:15

No worries Molly, it can happen to anyone. With so many entrants, it's quite easy to overlook.


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