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Battered Shoe

Mar-15-2009 13:59

This was a game that they played in Shades for a while and it was pretty fun.

The idea is that you post the first part of a News headline, and the next poster has to finish it. Then they have to post a new first part of a headline.

Get it? Have fun!


Ordo Ab Chao
Ordo Ab Chao

Mar-5-2011 17:01

the St. Valentine's Day Massacre.
Seven men are killed in a garage ordered by Al Capone, who is conveniently away in Miami at the time. Planned by McGurn and members of the Circus gang, imported hired killers are sent in the Moran warehouse to kill George "Bugs"Moran. Moran is a rival and thorn in Capone's side. Moran and his gang have posession of the lucreative Northside booze business and other rackets. The crews awaiting at the Circus Cafe are called in from this rooming house tipster to begin their fake raid.Once they arrive there is no turning back. Moran is nowhere to be found.The hired killers sent in to kill Moran mess up the hit by thinking that Moran is in the garage. One of the lookouts across the street had mistakingly taken one of the men entering the garage as Moran. Being late, Moran wasn't there and he had spotted the fake police cars on his way to the garage and mistook it for a raid. He doubled back and disappeared with his henchman. Inside the garage, the killers lined up the Moran men consisting of 5 Moran gangsters, one mechanic and an optometrist who gets a kick out of hanging around gangsters. A dog tied to a truck howls madly. The killers level their weapons consisting of two thompsons, one with a 20 round clip, and one with a 50 round drum. The killers know that the drum has a tendancy to jam on occaision, so just in case they make sure the 20 round clip is used to kill flawlessly. Two shotguns are also part of the arsenal.
rank Gusenberg miraculously survives the massacre and lives for 3 hours with 14 slugs in his body.
He refuses to mention anything about the massacre even though he knows he will die.

NASA prepares to crush giant aluminium can due to ...

Phaedra Rose
Phaedra Rose

Mar-10-2011 19:46

their latest space debris clean-up and recycling campaign. This latest endeavour will improve quality of life across the globe by .00382%.

Gaggles of geese have been sighted at or near...

Ordo Ab Chao
Ordo Ab Chao

Mar-18-2011 11:28

a Johnny Depp look-alike in Malaysia and Singapore on Tuesday they expect to agree a land swap deal in the next three months to resolve a decades-old geese territorial problem...

The best way to get a job is to wash behind...

Ed Carlyle
Ed Carlyle

Mar-18-2011 19:48

your ears. That's right folks. Start washing behind your ears. More and more employers are starting to say that the most distracting thing during interviews are the dirt caked up on people's ears because of their failure to wash.

In other news, the murder of Mr. Humpty Dumpty has been solved. The charging of Elmo and him being caught red-handed has been dropped. Waldo has been found hiding out in Bombay, India. When questioned about the murder, he had this to say...

Ordo Ab Chao
Ordo Ab Chao

Mar-20-2011 05:52

“I hate to advocate drugs, alcohol, violence, or insanity to anyone, but they've always worked for me...”
"I used to be Snow White, but I drifted..."

* Mystery surrounds the unexplained disappearance of 5000 Roman soldiers 2000 years ago therefore Archaeologists believe...

Sir Eduard Langston
Sir Eduard Langston

Apr-4-2011 12:50

they may have started a bonfire during attendance at a violin concert of the noted Emperor Nero. Apparently pranksters in the group were responsible for the spread of the fire, whereupon attendees dispersed to places as far away as what is now known as Northern Alaska, Mongolia, Ethiopia and, alas, the lost continent of Atlantis, which coincidentally has recently resurfaced in the vicinity of Nassau, Bahamas minus the reputed missing Roman Soldiers. However, evidence indicates that some of the architectural details are quite similar to the Romanesque period of the time of the Emperor Nero's violin concerto debut.

New reports have it that quality of life has declined due to an overabundance of....

Ordo Ab Chao
Ordo Ab Chao

Apr-8-2011 11:45

Bad Luck...
The International News Safety Institute today launched a Bad Luck Outbreak - Safety Update and Precautions on its website. This is aimed at providing the news media with a running update from the ground of safety-related information during the crisis as the Bad Luck continued to spread around the globe.

Signs of being contaminated with Bad Luck:

A black cat crossing your path
Spilling salt
Breaking a mirror
A horse sweating
Walking under ladders
Dropping a knife and picking it up
Giving an empty purse
Milk curdling
Putting a hat on the bed
Taking off your wedding ring
Seeing an owl during the day
Opening an umbrella indoors
Killing a seagull
Bread not rising
Killing a cricket
Putting your left foot on the floor first up when you get out of bed
Putting shoes on a table

Safety Update and Precautions:

A four leaf clover
A bird pooing on you
7 of anything coming at once
Lucky horseshoe
A naked woman at the helm of a ship
Your clothes being caught on a bush
A new moon
Sneezing 3 times before breakfast
Your hair being cut during a storm
Sleeping on unironed sheets
Carrying an acorn in your pocket
Whistleing in the dark
Finding a penny and picking it up
A ladybird
A bluebird
Carrying a rabbit's foot.
Crickets chirping
Putting on your clothes inside out
Picking up a pin
Seeing Bats flying overhead at nightfall
Walking in the rain

Penguins in South Africa and Argentina are losing their feathers due to...

Sir Eduard Langston
Sir Eduard Langston

Apr-10-2011 12:08

an Avian strain of Alopecia. Biologists around the globe are attempting to develop a compatible form of Rogaine to combat the problem.

Following recent outbreaks of feather-loss in Penguins, scientists are befuddled by recent indications of hair growth on porpoises and dolphins in the oceans of the Southern Hemisphere coinciding with the upcoming Autumn/Winter season. The Chief of Environmental and Biological Sciences for the U.N. had this to say about the occurrences.....

Akira Sensei
Akira Sensei

Apr-11-2011 23:35

"Whether it be our furry fishlike mammals or previously-feathered foul friends, frankly we feel at a loss. Further updates of frenetic studies are forthcoming."

Producers of the television series X-Files have revealed...

Ordo Ab Chao
Ordo Ab Chao

Apr-12-2011 03:55

that last October 20, at a Maryland high school, fifteen-year-old Jamie Schoonover was sent home from school with a referral slip noting that she was disciplined for “casting a spell on a student.” A classmate had accused Schoonover, an admitted practicing witch and the daughter of a witch, of placing a hex on her...

Today's media stories from the underworld papers bring forward...

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