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Nov-18-2007 10:24

Well, it's bedtime and I can't sleep. I wanna hear a story!!!

But not just any story, no... that would be too easy. I wanna hear a noir fairy tale.


THE PREMISE: Take a fairy tale and make it Noir.

THE RULES: * Must be based on an existing fairy tale - doesn't have to be a popular one, but at least point me to the original, if it's an obscure one.
* All entries must be posted no later than 11:59 PM, November 30, 2007.
* Spelling and grammar count.
* Please be realistic with story length. If it takes three posts to tell, it's too long!!

THE PRIZES: I'm workin' on it...but there will be prize(s).

I know the last couple of contests were on the restrictive and difficult side, and rewriting a fairy tale as Noir may not be the simplest thing, but there are very few restrictions and rules this time - so let's see what you've got!

Nov-27-2007 04:48

3 posts defiently to long? Cant seem to get mine down more than to less than 5100 characters. I can work on it and hack it about a bit if 2 posts is the max.

Nov-27-2007 09:58

Well, to be honest, I'd prefer the longer, better story. If you have to hack the crap out of it to make it fit two posts, then go for the three. I guess the better guideline would be quality over quantity...

On the other hand, please don't pad an entry just to make it long! It can be short and good, too.

Umm, this post is pointed at everyone, not just Stooby. :)

Nov-27-2007 16:01

Very nice Violet! Is there any more???

I thought Noirs had to include murder though! I looked it up on Wikipedia, so I'm guessing it's right...

Nov-28-2007 01:17

Little Dead Ridding-Hood.

Once Upon a Time in old London Town there lived a young girl who always wore red. She was known as Little Red Ridding-Hood…
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Vanessa Riding-Hood was my Goddaughter. A wonderfully spirited child of 5 she truly brought some life and cheer to my dark existence as a Sleuth. And now she was dead.

I had to find out who had killed her, whether to bring Vanessa justice or revenge I could not say.

One of my informants had contacted me to tell she had heard some news I might be interested in. Her name was Grandma, she had always been known that way, long before her hair turned white. No-one knew why but I thought it might be due to her wise and tenacious attitude that the elderly sometimes get, showing a steely fearless attitude that belies their age. Grandma had a heart and she brought justice in the only way she knew how. Nothing illegal ever happened in her block of flats and she helped me whenever she could. A slipped note here, a name there, a few words pointing me in the right direction… and killers and abusers were locked away, making her neighbourhood that little bit safer.

And so armed with my usual basket of provisions… just helping out an elderly friend… I knocked on the door of her flat.

The door swung open, a worrying sign from a usually sensible paranoid type. I stepped into the apartment and called out “Grandma?”

There was no answer and so as I stepped towards her bedroom I drew my revolver. I had won the gun in a poker game a year before, a deadly weapon with enough punch to knock a man dead at 100 paces; its owner Todd “Lumberjack” Harris had called it The Woodcutter.

I saw someone was in the bed, covers pulled high, barely able to make out their face in the dim light, the heavy curtains still drawn.

“Are you alright Grandma?” I asked.

“Hrmph” came the reply.

“My what very black hair you have Grandma… my what dreadfully black facial hair your have…”

Nov-28-2007 01:18

As I quickly pulled back the curtains the figure in the bed leapt out, pushed me roughly aside and ran.

I picked myself up off the floor and checked that my assailant had left. I then looked at the hair I had roughly pulled from the face of “Grandma” as he ran from the room.

A quick check of the room revealed Grandma pushed hurriedly into the wardrobe. I had clearly disturbed her killer before he could get away, I had a feeling this killer was the same that had murder little Vanessa Riding-Hood and had silenced Grandma after learning she knew of his crime.

Now this was even more personal, Grandma and I shared a common goal, a kindred spirit in a world going to hell. So without hesitating I went strait to see Edmund Bowlin the barber.

As I always did I slid in the back way. Taking a quick glance into the shop I could see that Edmund had a customer. I gave me usual rap on the door frame and slipped into the shadows to wait for the barber.

I didn’t have to wait long and in a whispered voice he asked “How can I help you detective?”

I hurriedly showed him the hair and asked him if he could tell me anything about it.

“Why yes I can detective, the owner is sat out the front; he came in clearly in a hurry and said he needed a total change of appearance. Now I know what that means and I don’t want any trouble here detect…”

I pushed past Edmund and burst into the barbers. The Woodcutter was levelled at the back of the head of the man in the chair before he could react. Now in the good light, angry face staring at me in the mirror I knew exactly who this was, a local thug, a burglar and mugger, rumoured to be a killer for hire, “Brian Wolf you are under arrest.” I said in my most intimidating voice.

Nov-28-2007 01:18

I saw Wolf’s hand reaching into his jacket, waited just long enough to be sure that he was pulling his own gun before slowly squeezing the trigger of The Woodcutter. At point blank range the force was not only deadly but gruesome. My revenge complete I turned and left.
______________________

Explaining things to the police had been easy, 2 murders cleared up, a thug off the streets. Clearing things up with Edmund was less easy, I had a feeling I would be doing quite a few favours for him over the coming months.

And then there was the funeral. One of the hardest things I have done in my life was to stand and watch the tiny coffin being lowered into the ground, hearing the Riding-Hood’s weeping in their sorrow and despair, listening to the priest talk about the justice of god. And I cried as the diggers began to fill the grave, little Vanessa laid to rest, Forever After.

Nov-28-2007 01:50

I took Noir as a reference to Sleuth Noir, rather than a reference to the Film Genre.

Nov-28-2007 02:50

I do agre a little with Kevin, Noir conjures up images of murder for me... actual there's often little else going on in Sleuth Noir to!!!

Nov-28-2007 04:25

It was all over town that Alleluia had busted a high profile mystery that involved enemies of TGH. Mrs. Cleopatra Green had decided she wanted to have such a smart and charming detective on her side. She had convinced Alleluia to be apart of TGH. Unfortunately, Cleopatra had become aware of Alleluia’s popularity among the faction, and eventually felt threatened. She had soon a member assassinate her.
Being the smart and charming detective that Alleluia was, she had been intuitive enough to see Cleopatra’s issues. She had deduced that Cleopatra would send Basil, to make the death more personal. Before the killing took place, Alleluia had made sure that Basil would be infatuated with her to no end. When Cleopatra had asked Basil to whack her, Basil had painstakingly agreed. He had visited Alleluia in her room at The Oasis, and convinced Alleluia to go into hiding, while he faked her death in an explosive accident. She agreed.
Pleased with herself, Cleopatra had visited the local bar to celebrate. She had been casually chatting with a fellow GH member about her triumph. That is when Shady had walked up to her to let her know that no one could rival the intellect and finesse that Alleluia posse, as she is still alive. In rage, Cleopatra stormed to the TGH’s HQ. Word got out of Basil’s plan. Cleopatra had decided to off Alleluia herself. Luckily for Alleluia, she was still in contact with the Concierge and had heard of what happened. One night, Cleopatra had come across Alleluia sitting in the Tricky Mister in NY. She disguised herself as a cocktail waitress and had slipped some new poisonous leaf into Alleluia’s mojito. A few seconds later Alleluia clutched her heart and fell to the floor.

Nov-28-2007 04:26

Basil could not accept Alleluia’s death, and had found her in hospital bed. He had walked up to her and given her one last kiss. She opened her eyes and smiled.
One day, Cleopatra had been reading the newspaper while visiting Shanghai about a new up and coming detective agency, headed by WHAT? The smartest and most charming lady? She had soon found out it was Alleluia. She had and walked straight up to her. “How?” Alleluia smiled, “When my London contact had informed me you were after me again, I had done some research and found that the melavian plant on display had gone missing. I had been chatting with Cyrus Tibby all night and he had informed me of your arrival. I noticed that the new cocktail waitress has the same mole above her eyebrow as you. Not to mention you made your drink to strong, I could smell it 5 ft. away. I wasn’t going to touch that. You wanted me dead, then so be it, I faked it. Basil found a Jane Doe corpse from the morgue that had resembled me and we decided to start over in Delhi. I was polite enough to get out of your way, however if you try to kill me again I have enough on back info on you secured to bring the whole GH down. Let’s play nice.” And she solved cases happily ever after.