1. Verbs HAS to agree with their subjects.
2. Prepositions are not words to end sentences with.
3. And don't start a sentence with a conjunction.
4. It is wrong to ever split an infinitive.
5. Avoid cliches like the plague. (They're old hat.)
6. Also, always avoid annoying alliteration.
7. Be more or less specific.
8. Parenthetical remarks (however relevant) are (usually) unnecessary.
9. Also too, never, ever use repetitive redundancies.
10. No sentence fragments.
11. Contractions aren't necessary and shouldn't be used.
12. Foreign words and phrases are not apropos.
13. Do not be redundant; do not use more words than necessary; it's highly superfluous.
14. One should NEVER generalize.
15. Comparisons are as bad as cliches.
16. Don't use no double negatives.
17. Eschew ampersands & abbreviations, etc.
18. One-word sentences? Eliminate.
19. Analogies in writing are like feathers on a snake.
20. The passive voice is to be ignored.
Very nice, and very funny Sledge!
I would agree with that, if this were being written in a third-person point-of-view. But it's written in first person. So:
1. Unless that's the way character (Hereafter referred to as C) speaks.
2. That's not an awful one.
5. Not so! Cliches are fine!
6. True. That's very annoying.
7. True. More-or-less.
10. They're okay. Everyone speaks like that.
11. Where did you get that? They make everything easier!
12. Depends on language.
13. Unless C is speaking.
14. Unless C is speaking.
16. Unless C is speaking.
17. As long as C is NOT speaking.
18. No. That one's wrong. One word is fine. Okay?
19. Analogies in writing are as needed as a bear needs human flesh to snack upon.
20. Unless C is speaking.
(Sorry, accidentally clicked post)
22. Unless C is speaking.
23. Unless stating an exclamatory sentence. (Duh!)
24. Unless C is speaking.
25. Big LOL! Apply that one whenever you want.
27. Always use quotations, when needed. Like, when somebody is speaking.
28. Unless C is speaking.
30. True. (Sort of! LOL)
31. Don't got that one!
32. Everyone with C!
33. They're no biggie, as long as C is speaking.