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CONTEST: 50 Words or Less
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Anikka
Anikka
Babelfish

Jul-18-2007 14:03

I've been wanting to do some kind of contest for a while now, so here we go. By the way, a huge thanks to Lady Emerald - she knows why. :-)

The rules of 50 Words or Less: Using a given opening line, you must write a story that uses 50 words or less. The opening line does not count toward your word total.

The rules of the contest:

* I will give a total of 5 opening lines. You may choose whichever line(s) you wish to use.

* You may write an entry for as many of the opening lines as you like, but only 1 story for each line. So, your maximum number of entries is 5. If you only like 3 of the opening lines, then write 3 stories. It's up to you.

* If you write multiple stories, they are not required to have anything to do with each other. On the other hand, you may link them into one overall story.

* Your story or stories must make sense. It also should be mystery-related, or be mysterious with a really interesting twist.

* Spelling and grammar DO count. Please. Spellcheck is our friend. (I realise that english is not everyone's primary language. It is usually not difficult to tell the difference between the grammar of someone writing in a not-ingrained language, as opposed to the grammar of someone who is too lazy to learn how to write properly.)

*All entries must be posted no later than 11:59 PM server time on July 28, 2007.

Now, you can't have a contest without prizes, right? Make sure you get those imaginations going! The winner will receive a three-month subscription (compliments of me) and a unique book for their detective (compliments of Ben). Sweet!

Your opening lines:

1. If I'd known how it would all end, I would never have started it.

2. The evidence was there, had anyone bothered to look.

3. Jimmy Donuts was just an old bum.

4. How had things even gotten as far as they had?

5. Tallulah shook her head in denial while her eyes opened wide with horror.

Replies

Cordelia Falco
Cordelia Falco
Battered Shoe

Jul-26-2007 09:36

Jimmy Donuts was just an old bum. Kids threw stones at him.

But the Jimmy I was looking at now seemed taller. Younger.

“Hello, doll. Been a long time. But my memory’s back now. I remember who I am " and just who gave me that crack on the head.”

Light glinted off the barrel of his gun.


Cordelia Falco
Cordelia Falco
Battered Shoe

Jul-26-2007 09:36

The evidence was there, had anyone bothered to look. Three pebbles, a carrot and a scarf lying in the yard.

Some smart alec cop came up with this story about a melted snowman.

Nice try. But the old guy with the scarred neck and the donkey who chucks stones at girls’ windows seems to have skipped town.


Cordelia Falco
Cordelia Falco
Battered Shoe

Jul-26-2007 09:37

How had things even gotten as far as they had?

I looked at the corpse lying forlornly in the road. I knew the story.

I was depressed so I hit the bottle. I was broke so I took a job walking some old girl’s lapdog. Put it together and you have an angry truck driver and a very dead chihuahua.


Kelly O'Publik
Kelly O'Publik

Jul-26-2007 13:25

1. If I'd known how it would all end, I would never have started it.

My husband Jimmy hasn't given me the attention I needed in a long time. I never planned on cheating. I didn't intend to hurt him. But the opportunity presented itself, and I couldn't resist John's charm. So many mistakes... So many lapses of my better judgment... I'm so sorry, Jimmy.

2. The evidence was there, had anyone bothered to look.

I knew that my wife was up to something, but I could not believe that she would ever be unfaithful. Tallulah and I had gone to the same church since childhood. But looking back now, I see that it was all too obvious. How could she do this to me?

3. Jimmy Donuts was just an old bum.

It's a mystery why my sweet Tallulah refused to leave him. He never respected her one bit. All he did was lie around on the couch all day and not pay her any mind. And it was only a matter of time before he got what was coming to him.

4. How had things even gotten as far as they had?

It used to be just "bingo" on Mondays and "bridge" on Thursdays. Then she wouldn't even coming up with excuses to get out of the house. I should've known better than to try to follow her, but I had to be sure. I grabbed my knife and headed after her.

5. Tallulah shook her head in denial while her eyes opened wide with horror.

It all happened so fast. Jimmy came up screaming behind them, knife in hand. John drew a gun, and began firing. Tallulah tried to grab it from him, but was too late. She pulled the trigger, and John fell. The police arrived as she cried, still holding the smoking gun.


Kelly O'Publik
Kelly O'Publik

Jul-26-2007 13:27

I have to appreciate the irony of having to wait until there are less than 90 detectives logged on so that I can get on to post my entry, hoping to win a subscription so that I can sleuth without having to wait until there are less than 90 detectives logged on.

Kelly O'Publik
Kelly O'Publik

Jul-26-2007 20:49

Oh, and in story #4, "coming" should be "come." Obviously I should have proofread it a fourth time. But if post-posting editing is not allowed, I'll take the grammar hit.

Anikka
Anikka
Babelfish

Jul-28-2007 23:45

Wow, I really need to thank all you creative story submitters for your entries! Time is almost up to put in an entry, but seeing as no new stories have been posted in the past 48 hours, I don't think that's going to be an issue. :-)

There are three judges: the lovely Arabella Parker, the spirited Rhiemma Moon, and the... well, me. It may take a couple of days, considering the number of wonderful entries, but you'll hear from us soon!

riaparslow
riaparslow

Jul-29-2007 00:41

Jimmy Donuts was just an old bum.
He sat around on park benches, drinking from a bottle, swearing at anyone who would listen.
Too bad he swore at the wrong person today.
Now he was dead, kicked to death.
I looked down at my shoes, they were covered in blood.
"Too bad Jimmy"

The evidence was there, had anyone bothered to look.
But the police had hushed everyone away, nothing to see, just an old tramp, that's all.
Seems to me these police don't do their jobs properly these days, all they wanna do is stuff donuts.
They would never find their killer, not if I could help it.

How had things even gotten as far as they had?
Tallulah had put up with Jimmy for years, he was always womanising and drinking, spending all the housekeeping down the bookies.
She should have just left him years ago, she loved him I guess.
She would never have let anyone else have him.

Tallulah shook her head in denial while her eyes opened wide with horror.
She couldn't believe what she had just done, she threw herself down to poor old Jimmy, "I'm sorry baby, I didn't mean it," crying.
I'd seen the whole thing, "Tallulah, get over here now!"
I pulled her away and dragged her into the bushes.

If I'd known how it would all end, I would never have started it.
But it was too late now. Tallulah was on the next plane to England and I was here wearing her shoes. I couldn't let her take the wrap for that, she was far too young, still had a life ahead of her.
"So have I" and walked away.


Stooby
Stooby
Well-Connected

Jul-29-2007 00:59

Good luck to all who entered. I for one found it fun to read the competition’s entries!

May the best Sleuth win.


Brasco De Gama
Brasco De Gama
Old Shoe

Jul-29-2007 10:28

Yeah, it was certainly a fun competition, I loved the challenge, and enjoyed reading the entries as much as I enjoyed writting my own.
What a talented bunch you all are ;)



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