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Serges
Serges
Vigilante

Jan-24-2007 23:11



Replies

Ranier Peperhaut
Ranier Peperhaut
Washed Up Punter

Jan-28-2007 02:08

Pete and Re-pete go into the store.

Pete comes out. Who's left?



Pete and Re-pete go into the store.

Pete comes out. Who's left?



Pete and Re-pete go into the store.

Pete comes out. Who's left?

Ranier Peperhaut
Ranier Peperhaut
Washed Up Punter

Jan-28-2007 02:17

An Idiot is car-jacked on the side of the road. His car-jackers pull him out of the car and draw a 2 foot circle in the dirt.

They tell him he has to stand in that circle and never step foot outside of it until they say he can. NO MATTER WHAT.

The Idiot is scared so he, of course, gets in the circle and stays there.

They walk back over to his car, and are about to get in, when they look back at the Idiot and he is laughing.

"Why are you laughing? We just dented the crap out of your car?"
"Ohhhh, no reason" the Idiot replies.

This annoys them, so they start to kick his car and cause big dents all over. They look back at the Idiot and he is laughing really hard.

Now they're getting pissed, so they take out a crowbar and a baseball bat and they start smashing his car like crazy. Windshield, headlights, mirrors... all smashed.

This is driving them crazy, so they walk up to the Idiot and ask him, FOR ONE LAST TIME, why is he laughing?

The Idiot answers:

"Well, everytime you turn your back to me, *giggle, giggle* I step out of the circle *snort, snort* even though you told me not too!" *roll on the floor laughing*

Ranier Peperhaut
Ranier Peperhaut
Washed Up Punter

Jan-28-2007 02:20

Oops, sorry about that last one... it's a little mixed up. I typed the parts in the wrong order, and didn't realize that I didn't fix them properly. But I suppose you get the gist...

That's what happens when I too tired.

And yes, I am out of stupid jokes. Lol.
Those are my favourites!

yoyofoshow
yoyofoshow
Old Shoe

Jan-28-2007 06:10

Here you go guys. Have fun!

http://youtube.com/watch?v=smlrSYiYd_o

Adam Carter
Adam Carter
Big Winner

Jan-28-2007 08:09

Do you ever notice that when you're driving, anyone going slower than you is an idiot and everyone driving faster than you is a maniac?

biggie528
biggie528
Lucky Stiff

Jan-28-2007 09:54

LOL Ranier you are on a tear!

Raven X
Raven X
Well-Connected

Jan-28-2007 10:37

A man, wanting to rob a downtown Bank of America, walked into the Branch and wrote this: "Put all your muny in this bag."
While standing in line, waiting to give his note to the teller, he began to worry that someone had seen him write the note and might call the police before he reached the teller's window.
So he left the Bank of America and crossed the street to the Wells Fargo Bank. After waiting a few minutes in line, he handed his note to the Wells Fargo teller. She read it and, surmising from his spelling errors that he wasn't the brightest light in the harbor, told him that she could not accept his stickup note because it was written on a Bank of America deposit slip and that he would either have to fill out a Wells Fargo deposit slip or go back to Bank of America.
Looking somewhat defeated, the man said, "OK" and left.
He was arrested a few minutes later, as he was waiting in line back at Bank of America.


A guy walked into a little corner store with a shotgun and demanded all of the cash from the cash drawer.
After the cashier put the cash in a bag, the robber saw a bottle of Scotch that he wanted behind the counter on the shelf.
He told the cashier to put it in the bag as well, but the cashier refused and said, "Because I don't believe you are over 21."
The robber said he was, but the clerk still refused to give it to him because she didn't believe him.
At this point, the robber took his driver's license out of his wallet and gave it to the clerk.
The clerk looked it over and agreed that the man was in fact over 21 and she put the Scotch in the bag.
The robber then ran from the store with his loot.
The cashier promptly called the police and gave the name and address of the robber that he got off the license.
They arrested the robber two hours later.

MamaTerra
MamaTerra
Assistant Postman

Feb-1-2007 07:03

Saturday morning I got up early, put on my long johns, dressed
quietly, made my lunch, grabbed the dog, slipped quietly into the garage to
hook the boat to the truck, and proceeded to back out into a torrential
downpour.

There was snow mixed with the rain and the wind was blowing 50 mph so
I pulled back into the garage, turned on the radio, and discovered that
the weather would be bad throughout the day.

I went back into the house, quietly undressed, and slipped back into
bed.

There I cuddled up to my wife's back, now with a different
anticipation and whispered, "The weather out there is terrible."

She sleepily replied, "Can you believe my stupid husband is out
fishing in that crap?"

Coda
Coda
Well-Connected

Feb-6-2007 17:18

Thanks to all, you have made me smile made me laugh.Life has been a bit shite lately, I lost my friend Paul recently, he loved a joke, he would have apprecaited this thread. Ta for cheering me up.

Larry the Toe
Larry the Toe

Feb-10-2007 06:38

What is red and goes tick- tock?
An apple. The tick-tock was to confuse you.

What is red and goes tick tock?
A clock. This time the red was to confuse you.

What is red and goes tick tock?
An egg. Now both were to confuse you.

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