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Sep-8-2004 12:29

Sherlock Holmes and Dr Watson go on a camping trip. After a good dinner and a bottle of wine, they retire for the night, and go to sleep.
Some hours later, Holmes wakes up and nudges his faithful friend. "Watson, look up at the sky and tell me what you see."
"I see millions and millions of stars, Holmes" replies Watson.
"And what do you deduce from that?"
Watson ponders for a minute.
"Well, astronomically, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Astrologically, I observe that Saturn is in Leo. Horologically, I deduce that the time is approximately a quarter past three. Meteorologically, I suspect that we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. Theologically, I can see that God is all powerful, and that we are a small and insignificant part of the universe. What does it tell you, Holmes?"
Holmes is silent for a moment. "Watson, you idiot!" he says. "Someone has stolen our tent!"

Sep-16-2004 07:04


The CIA had an opening for an assassin. After all the background checks, interviews, and testing were done, there were three finalists... two men and a woman.

For the final test, the CIA agents took one of the men to a large metal door and handed him a gun. "We must know that you will follow your instructions, no matter what the circumstances. Inside this room, you will find your wife sitting in a chair. Kill Her!!!"

The man said, "You can't be serious. I could never shoot my wife." The agent said, "Then you're not the right man for this job. Take your wife and go home."

The second man was given the same instructions. He took the gun and went into the room. All was quiet for about five minutes. Then the man came out with tears in his eyes. "I tried, but I can't kill my wife." The agent said, "You don't have what it takes. Take your wife and go home."

Finally, it was the woman's turn. She was given the instruction to kill her husband. She took the gun and went into the room. Shots were heard, one shot after another. They heard screaming, crashing, banging on the walls. After a few minutes, all was quiet. The door opened slowly and there stood the woman. She wiped the sweat from her brow.

This gun is loaded with blanks", she said. "I had to beat him to death with the chair."

Moral: Women are evil. Don't mess with them.

Sep-17-2004 17:15

HAHA! THAT IS GREAT!

Nov-22-2004 16:15

Reader's Digest says that Greyling's joke was voted 2nd funniest joke of all time!

Nov-22-2004 16:51

And the first one was?

Nov-22-2004 17:18

HA! So funny!

Nov-23-2004 13:14

I don't remember, go to the Library and check it out.

Dec-6-2004 14:24

A detective named jones was sitting in his office...... whaching..... waiting. suddenly a women walked in. "
Jones i have a case for you." she said.
"Whats that?"jones inquired.
"Your case!"
"Well please explain to me what this case is about." jones said growing impatiant.
"You wanted a case didn't you?"
"well i'm always looking for a job, now if you could just explain to me the details of this case......."
The women frowned, then laughed. "A SUITcase not a mystery-thing!" The women gestered to a leather suitcase
"You secetary said you were looking for a new suitcase and...."
Jones was verry embaressed

THE END

Dec-6-2004 14:25

*sigh* that wasn't as funny as i had hoped.

Dec-6-2004 15:16

Actually, that what I was thinking what I finished reading it. But then your comment underneath.....actually made me chuckle. :)

Dec-7-2004 03:30

i needed ur comment jstkdn to really start to laugh