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What's the most humorous thing that
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Miss_Wiles
Miss_Wiles

Apr-27-2004 10:38



Replies

Kenneth L
Kenneth L

Jan-3-2006 01:47

There was a case in which a guy had three lovers, ALL MALE.

Also, someone was "drunk" proved by research, and his fake alibi was the bartender.

Hellequin
Hellequin

Jan-4-2006 16:15

Haw! Just hit a case which proves that the secret societies really do control us all... or at least me...

"Prudence began to tell me how she had found her Master in his kitchen. The police were puzzled. They had no viable leads. (As if they ever did I thought.) So now she was here asking for my help.

"I can pay whatever you ask," she said. My thoughts came swift, "Whatever I ask, huh?"

The thought of something like this happening to my own Master urged me to take on this case. That and the grumbling of my empty stomach."

Yeeessss, Master. Must solve cases for the Master...

Gorank
Gorank

Feb-11-2006 20:10

I had one case in which one of the suspects "invited me in and politely asked me wanted I wanted to know." However, his picture bore a grimace more sutiable for bathing in battery acid than inviting me in, especially since I was the detective and he turned out to be innocent.

I've never encountered an Opium Dealer (perhaps because I've never left New York), but don't you thing somebody should arrest THEM? I know it used to be legal, but I think it became illegal by the time of the story. I don't think there should be any in Shanghai, because after the two Opium Wars, an emperor issued a decree illegalizing opium. **bows as other detectives applaud his knowledge** (not that I'm an egomaniac or anything)

Gorank
Gorank

Feb-11-2006 20:12

I forgot to mention, there were TWO decrees, the 1st permitted its medical use, while the 2nd one prohibited it.

Sam Average
Sam Average

Feb-13-2006 16:08

Are you really sure you want to piss off the drug barons? It's not like the police would help you out because 1) they're incompetent 2) they're corrupt 3) You give them a bad name by solving all their cases. That's why there are so many opium dealers.

I've encountered many an opium dealer in NYC. Who remembers the birthday of their drug dealer anyway? o_O

Peter Gunn
Peter Gunn

Feb-13-2006 21:42

The "long forgotten slight"

If you can't remember the slight and it's been forgotten for so long, why kill over it now?

I'm falling in love with the victim's wife. The victim was 35 years old, his lover was male, his lover was in love with his wife. His lover killed him...am I next?! To top it off the wife is the little old lady picture. She looks about 80, gray haired with granny glasses.

If his lover was in love with his wife, why not just make one big happy party of it? No one would be dead.

The curly haired bald man; The hair points to *Tom* the witness points to *Tom* and he has no alibi, but the picture is a bald guy. Hmm he must have realised he dropped a hair so went home and shaved his head.

The 10 year old killer? The picture is a little boy with dark hair and glasses, he was the victims lover, his alibi was "I was with the bartender" and my research says he was arrested in a brothel that caters to "unusal tastes". Goodness they just grow up so fast these days!

BadAss
BadAss
Charioteer

Feb-15-2006 04:25

Funny when you work on a favor that particular townie gives you the first lead but when you ask "Have you heard or seen anything?" they ususally aren't much of a help. The mysterious case of the clueless whistleblower.

Sam Average
Sam Average

Feb-15-2006 14:59

I tell you, they all must have been in on this one murder. Most of the alibis were the bartender, and the one guy who said he wasn't there was picked up by the cops for being drunk. I swear, they all must have been getting drunk in celebration that the assassination of the guy was about to happen.

One rule as detectives that we're supposed to follow is 'suspect the client' (especially if you're paranoid like me and don't won't to spend money on bribes if the client is going to turn out to be the murder)... expect of course when it's a townie... Riiight.

Maddie Hayes
Maddie Hayes
Well-Connected

Feb-18-2006 02:26

The names in Shanghai crack me up. I saw one name that was Wu wu, another that was Fen Shing, and someone else who had a last name of Ping I think.

So I came up with Wu wu fenshing ping.

HollaBack
HollaBack

Mar-12-2006 02:17

It's been happening to be repeatedly, but it continues to amuse me when my client tells me it's none of my business when I ask them for their alibi and they tell me it's none of my business. Um, excuse me sir/madam, but you did just hire me to ask that question and YOU made it my business. Silly clients.

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