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crunchpatty
crunchpatty
Old Shoe

Aug-30-2006 01:51

I heart stupidity. When you see it, post it here. I'll start.

Some of you know that I've do some teaching of first year sociology students in university. I really enjoy it, and love my students, but -GAWD- grading their work is a nightmare.

Through the course of a year, they have to write short essays on a range of topics ---feminism, Karl Marx, education, Freud, crime, etc. I feel kinda guilty laughing at these because of course they are writing under extreme pressure, but holy bobo I find them funny! Every so often, they write something so frickin' hysterical that it makes me gag laughing. These fleeting gems, I collect. Thought y'all might get a kick out of some of them.

Here we go. (nb, all typos and grammar boo boos are theirs from here on, not mine)

"Education is not really as old as many people think. It all came about in
the 1960s when the Russians were more advanced with outerspace."

"There is no evidence of women in society until the late 1990s"

"Freud is the classic theory of gender he believes the boy has the penis the girl has the clitoris simple as that"

"Freud said that a boy who plays too many dolls might be a p_ssy in later life"

"Feminists think women are the lowest of the low"

"Education is bias it only works for children who come from families where the parents are rich white and male"

"Hitlar believed in the destroying the Jews, however, his dictation only lasted until he was alive, after it was forgotten."

"Weber saw society from his eyes"

"someone from the low class is no good to us. we don't see them as nonsuccessful. That is because of sociology"

"Max Weber is a known and accredited sociologist"

"All around us in our society it is, said to be all around us these 'bureacracy' for example God is higher than Jeesus. The boss."



Replies

Snake 7
Snake 7

Oct-7-2006 15:50

me.


lol!

I looked at the product warnings and they were hilarious! Thanks
Autumnsprings!!

crunchpatty
crunchpatty
Old Shoe

Oct-24-2006 01:19

OK, so checkity-check it: done grading the first round of mid-terms and you know what that means...yes yes y'all - more STUPID!

The main course of this here stupid-du-jour comes in 'random utterance' format-- my comments in brackets.

"Latipso's are like hospitals except they are much more intense. Also because maidens were the supposed healers, whereas even the husband's wife hasn't seen him naked or performed any intercourse-related actions"

"if you take a blond black person and surround them in a society of white people where white people disliked black people the black person if he was never told he was black would also grow to dislike white people." --(But only if he was blond?)

"Usually [class struggle] will end by revolutionitation"

"Back then, in the present..." (ahh, famous first words)

"It is no surprise that a baby girl gets his/her genes from his/her parents" (If it's on the "his" end of things, it's probably pretty shocking to someone!)

"If enough students decided that they shouldn't have to sit in chairs in class, maybe they preferred to lay down in tiny beds, they could band together and force change" (Kum-bayaaah, m'lord...)

For dessert, we need Q&A:

Q: Sign your name on the first page of the exam.
A: D!

Q: Would the authors agree that female sociologists were invisible in early sociology?
A: They would agree. The women were whipped out!

A.1: No, because over the years, many women writers have been so famous and so recognized that they've managed to outsell so many male writers, including Charels Dickenson"

Q: Why did the author that in one way, Helen Keller was not fully human when she was a child? (They had read someone who was arguing that language and communication capacities were what make humans, 'human')

A: Because Helen Keller did not have the ability to think straight.

A.1: Because she was still only a fetus and developing.

(trumpet noise)

A.2: Helen Keller is a squeegee kid because she doesn't behave as other kids.


crunchpatty
crunchpatty
Old Shoe

Oct-24-2006 01:52

*fries the maggot of ignorance in the smoking-hot, star-crossed grease of inborn stupidity for onenanna and TOTALLY brings all this up at the next union meeting*

Secret_Squirrel
Secret_Squirrel
Safety Officer

Oct-24-2006 02:16

You just know the kid who beleives in revolutionitation is going to emigrate and become the President of the good old U S of A. Though having tried to type said word, and resorted to cutting and pasting, maybe the kid deserved kudos after all.

biggie528
biggie528
Lucky Stiff

Oct-24-2006 09:11

ROFL

kcoenich8
kcoenich8

Nov-3-2006 19:47


what I saw in the local news... a pair of theifs gets in a bus to assault it...
in the act, drives thru a police car and all the bus passengers shout at the cops...
the cops stop their car a run to the assaulted bus, the two theifs get scared, one of them runs away... the other one, didnĀ“t know what to do, so he sits on the bus,
pretending he is a passenger... pretty smart eh?

Ravenclaw15
Ravenclaw15

Nov-3-2006 20:22

Sometimes my roommate frightens me. The other day, she suggested I borrow one of her books with this reccomendation: "It's so scary! And it's a completely true story, so that makes it even more scary!!"

This book was actaully "My Life At Rose Red," the cheesy ghost story about a man-eating mansion. The book was also made into a movie by Stephen King, and features voodoo priestesses, swirling vortexes to the underworld, and the standard Indian burial ground underneath the house.
In one scene, previously harmelss plants in a greenhouse wrap their vines around a police officer and eat him alive, leaving only a belt behind.

I tried to break it to my roommate that this was a work of fiction, kind of a poor man's Blair Witch. She didn't believe me, and I was forced to show her several web sites explaining that this is not a true story.

crunchpatty
crunchpatty
Old Shoe

Nov-5-2006 00:55

Oh.My.God. Ravenclaw, I'd move, lol. That's too stupid to allow to sleep in your home. Seriously, get out before she confuses the fire extinguisher with a dress-me-up grover refrigerator magnet set.

crunchpatty
crunchpatty
Old Shoe

Dec-6-2006 01:52

okay so here we are a month later and I've done some (by which I mean humploads of) marking since the last time. There haven't been as many brilliantly stupid ones this time round (hey, but who knows what Santa has in his dunce bag for the devotees of the dumb for next time, right?)

1. They were asked to give the name of two central concepts in sociology. The proper terms for these concepts are 'anomic suicide' and 'organic solidarity'.

Um. Yeah. So these showed up on exams as 'atomic suicide' (nice to leave with a bang) and 'orgasmic solidarity' (that's a movement I can get behind...even if it TOTALLy changes the point of union politics, lol)

2. Some quotes:

(Look out Tokyo, dumbzilla is coming and he brought markers)

"Anime is what occurs when there is a breakdown in social order" (This guy was looking for "anOmie" there)

(Denim Dreamz...pow chickie pow pow)

"Freud believed that we bought the expensive designer jeans because we yearned to be sexy"

(Fun with adjectives)

"Marx believed there was two kinds of power: legitimate power and really really bad power"

(Calendar fun, communist style)
"Marx knew social change could take a long time, decades or even months or whatnot"

(All jobs are nobile, in the right light moment)
"Max Weber was known to be somewhat of a nutjob..."

(Redundantest most redundant most redundantest repetitivest opening sentence ever)

"For the most part of theories and concepts we can see some similarities differences among these theories and concepts so by looking at the similarities and differences we can definitely derive definitive answers about the similarities, differences and theories and concepts, if not personal opinions"


yoyofoshow
yoyofoshow
Old Shoe

Dec-6-2006 02:09

Here's an email I got recently, I though it would fit in best here:

Every year, English teachers from across the country can submit their
collections of actual analogies and metaphors found in high school
essays. These excerpts are published each year to the amusement of
teachers
across the country. Here are last year's winners.....

1. Her face was a perfect oval, like a circle that had its two sides
gently compressed by a Thigh Master.

2. His thoughts tumbled in his head, making and breaking alliances like
underpants in a dryer without Cling Free.

3. He spoke with the wisdom that can only come from experience, like a
guy who went blind because he looked at a solar eclipse without one of
those boxes with a pinhole in it and now goes around the country
speaking at high schools about the dangers of looking at a solar

eclipse
without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it.

4. She grew on him like she was a colony of E. Coli, and he was
room-temperature Canadian beef.

5. She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog makes
just before it throws up.

6. Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever.

7. He was as tall as a six-foot, three-inch tree.

8. The revelation that his marriage of 30 years had disintegrated
because of his wife's infidelity came as a rude shock, like a surcharge
at a
formerly surcharge-free ATM machine.

9. The little boat gently drifted across the pond exactly the way a
bowling ball wouldn't.

10. McBride fell 12 stories, hitting the pavement like a Hefty bag
filled with vegetable soup.

11. From the attic came an unearthly howl. The whole scene had an
eerie, surreal quality, like when you're on vacation in another city

and
Jeopardy comes on at 7:00 p. m. instead of 7:30.

12. Her hair glistened in the rain like a nose hair after a sneeze.

13. The hailstones leaped from the pavement, just like maggots when you
fry them in hot grease.

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