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The Annual Sleuth Beauty Pageant 2009
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Molly Maltese
Molly Maltese
Old Shoe

Nov-11-2009 19:36

"(to be sung softly and slowly, with solemnity)
From street to penthouse suite, master of mystery
She dusts everything she sees
She aces every case
She’s boss at the Arch Villain chase
She’s got a nice enough face.
She is…Miss Sleuthvilleeeeee
Hold your fedora up high
Hold your fedora up high
Raise it to the sky
Hold your fedora up high
Woaaa yeye oooh ye sky high, hold your fedora up high..."

(adapted from William Shatner's "Miss United States" from the hit movie, Miss Congeniality.)

(NOTE: These lyrics in no way imply that no males can enter the beauty pageant, but putting "he/she/it" everywhere necessary in the song would reeeeally diminish the effect of the poetic masterpiece before you.
Males are welcome and are encouraged!)

Welcome to the revival of the Annual Sleuth Beauty Pageant that I have hastily undertaken.

It's time to whip out your curling irons, your fake eyelashes, your obscene amounts of gel, your lipstick and most importantly your cameras, or perhaps just your knowledge of movie stars or notable public figures of Hollywood's Golden Age and school us folks at Sleuth in just what a beautiful avatar is! Or, you could skip the theme and just snap a pic of yourself. That too, we certainly understand. PLEASE NOTE: ONCE THE CONTEST BEGINS AND YOU ARE NOMINATED, YOU ARE NOT PERMITTED TO CHANGE YOUR AVATAR FOR THE DURATION OF THE CONTEST. FAILURE TO COMPLY WILL RESULT IN YOUR REMOVAL FROM THE RUNNING.

Here's how this is going to work. Consider this a warning post: if you think there's a chance you might be nominated, we suggest you change your avatar to its most flattering aspect possible. Currently nominations will be accepted once the judges are found and Ben is supplicated in earnest for his blessing.

As of right now, nominations are not being accepted! If you post one I shall smite thee. I will post as soon as I have full clearance to start and you can nominate to your hearts content. Good luck!

Message me if you are confused on anything above

Replies

Riza Hawkeye
Riza Hawkeye
First Nomad

Dec-23-2009 14:55

Of course, JZ! Every woman would fall for a shirtless guy with a hairy chest! :D

*smiles as she remembers* Did you just say shirt? ;)

Joseph Zeo
Joseph Zeo
Tale Spinner

Dec-24-2009 04:07

I mentioned just a shadow of the tragic past and within 10 minutes Riza replied the post... You sure you didn't install a tracking device on me the last time we.... *shut up abruptly and downed a whole bottle of Vodka to shut himself up*

Irene
Irene

Dec-24-2009 04:51

Unless, of course, there is a nice guy around with the hair on his head, and a chest that looks more like it's belonging to a human than to an ape.

Joseph Zeo
Joseph Zeo
Tale Spinner

Dec-30-2009 05:11

Hey, I do have hair on my head! It's just a bad photo of me, that's all *begins to draw more hair on picture using photoshop*, as to a hairy chest, i though some girls find it sexy...

Irene
Irene

Dec-30-2009 05:27

I believe that different girls find different men sexy ;-)
Riza obviously goes after a strong natural man who can give her safety by fighting all enemies, while I go after a man who is more clever and therefore is able to protect me without the use of violence at all.

So Riza is free to take that hairy chest, I rather want that smart guy ;-)

Joseph Zeo
Joseph Zeo
Tale Spinner

Dec-30-2009 06:03

Sounds like Turtledove IS very popular then.... he looks gentleman enough.

Now Irene, you make me sound really like a caveman now.... JZ really ain't like that!
*shaving off unruly hair from [locations non-disclosed]*

Irene
Irene

Dec-30-2009 06:50

Irene get a wide smile on her face, goes out and prepares a special gift for the man she found interest in....
The gift is going to be a test. First she finds a very special watch. It's a delicate diamond watch that for an untrained eye just looks like it's showing time. A true sleuth would realize it contains a tiny camera and a tiny tape recorder, so that compromizing witness statements and evidence don't get lost. Now, it would be no test if she just gave JZ the watch, so what Irene does are to put it in a secret compartment, that needs a special code and trick to reveal, in a beautiful box. The box will for an untrained eye look like it contains a nice pen and ink-set, with both ordinary as well as vanishing ink of course, after all, it's a gift to a sleuth.
- and any regular sleuth would be happy to get renewing of their ordinary working tool.
Irene wraps the box in nice paper, and attatch a tag to it saying:
"To Joseph Zeo. To be used with careful consideration. Irene"
Then she finds his office, and put it on his desk.
JZ will probably wonder how she managed to get inside his well guarded office, but then, Irene is not always a hopelessly lost woman.

Molly Maltese
Molly Maltese
Old Shoe

Dec-30-2009 12:07

>_>

Molly would like to interrupt the role-playing to interject that she finds hairy chests quite disturbing. She thanks you for your time.

Anais Nin
Anais Nin
Thespian

Dec-30-2009 21:28

Anais would like to agree with the above statement.

Molly Maltese
Molly Maltese
Old Shoe

Dec-30-2009 21:47

Molly appreciates the long wait everyone has endured and has decided that because the contest has gone on so long, she will be announcing the winners before she is lynched. Without further ado, I shall announce the 1st, 2nd and 3rd runner ups, followed by the Pageant winner. Feel free to make a speech.

*drumroll*

The 3rd Runner-Up in the Annual Sleuth Beauty Pageant 2009 is...Riza Hawkeye!

The 2nd Runner-Up in the Annual Sleuth Beauty Pageant 2009 is...Lady Zeurgirdor!

The 1st Runner-Up in the Annual Sleuth Beauty Pageant 2009, who will take the Miss Sleuthville title if the winner is unable to perform her duties, yadayadayada is.... Anais Nin!

And the Winner of the Annual sleuth Beauty Pageant 2009, who now earns the title of Miss Sleuthville is...

*drumroll*

...The Contessa!



Thank you for participating, nominating Sleuthville's prettiest, and in the case of turtledove, roguishly handsome ;) Congratulations everybody!

Speech, Speech!!!

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