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The Annual Sleuth Beauty Pageant 2009
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Molly Maltese
Molly Maltese
Old Shoe

Nov-11-2009 19:36

"(to be sung softly and slowly, with solemnity)
From street to penthouse suite, master of mystery
She dusts everything she sees
She aces every case
She’s boss at the Arch Villain chase
She’s got a nice enough face.
She is…Miss Sleuthvilleeeeee
Hold your fedora up high
Hold your fedora up high
Raise it to the sky
Hold your fedora up high
Woaaa yeye oooh ye sky high, hold your fedora up high..."

(adapted from William Shatner's "Miss United States" from the hit movie, Miss Congeniality.)

(NOTE: These lyrics in no way imply that no males can enter the beauty pageant, but putting "he/she/it" everywhere necessary in the song would reeeeally diminish the effect of the poetic masterpiece before you.
Males are welcome and are encouraged!)

Welcome to the revival of the Annual Sleuth Beauty Pageant that I have hastily undertaken.

It's time to whip out your curling irons, your fake eyelashes, your obscene amounts of gel, your lipstick and most importantly your cameras, or perhaps just your knowledge of movie stars or notable public figures of Hollywood's Golden Age and school us folks at Sleuth in just what a beautiful avatar is! Or, you could skip the theme and just snap a pic of yourself. That too, we certainly understand. PLEASE NOTE: ONCE THE CONTEST BEGINS AND YOU ARE NOMINATED, YOU ARE NOT PERMITTED TO CHANGE YOUR AVATAR FOR THE DURATION OF THE CONTEST. FAILURE TO COMPLY WILL RESULT IN YOUR REMOVAL FROM THE RUNNING.

Here's how this is going to work. Consider this a warning post: if you think there's a chance you might be nominated, we suggest you change your avatar to its most flattering aspect possible. Currently nominations will be accepted once the judges are found and Ben is supplicated in earnest for his blessing.

As of right now, nominations are not being accepted! If you post one I shall smite thee. I will post as soon as I have full clearance to start and you can nominate to your hearts content. Good luck!

Message me if you are confused on anything above

Replies

Molly Maltese
Molly Maltese
Old Shoe

Nov-23-2009 02:52

Molly's Note:

There's been concern rising up here and there, a fact which I am both mildly stunned and amused by, so I just have a little message for everyone who was included in tonights running:

I am not solely responsible for tonights outcome. Yes, I acted as one of the voters for the purpose of a tie-breaker for 4 or 5 contestants with the same scores. The results were drawn from four lists of scores, which were then added up. The 10 highest scores became our 10 finalists you see above. Yes, I performed this math, which was simple addition, a task any of our judges could have performed. I saved the three of them the drag of doing it by adding it up myself.

However, if you still doubt my integrity in this process, you are free to PM any of the judges who may ask me for the scores and each of the lists. To preserve voter privacy, no one besides the judges shall see the lists, but they can validate the scores for you.

Personally, I think most of us recognize that this isn't a true contest as much as it is a fun community activity designed to bring out fresh faces in the community, but if we're really going for cutthroat Miss America around here, I believe your options are more than clear above.

:) That's all I have to say on that, sorry if that was worded a little sternly.

Good luck everyone! Feel free to heckle Ben to put the player poll up! ;D

-Molly

Breitkat
Breitkat
Pinball Amateur

Nov-23-2009 03:18

Sounds to me like some people need to go find another daiquiri or two, and go check out the Swimsuit Round before Ctown finds his scissors and things get seriously provocative.

(And don't even THINK bout that one, Bud. ;-)

I had a look at all the contestants a little earlier tonight. I only saw one that made me a bit squeamish (I saw those pinking shears, Ctown!!). Fortunately, he was only nominated for gettin' his butt swatted or somethin' like that (now there's a truly terrifying prospect to me).

We've had some....let's call 'em squabbles, for lack of a better word from my tired brain, in the past, associated with this Tournament. Like all tournaments here, this is s'pposed to be a FUN contest, y'all. How bout we all play nice, please?

Thanks for all the work, Molly. You're doing great. ;-D

*Swipes the pruners, scapel, and blowtorch Ctown's holding behind his back. You too, bud. ;-D *

Breit

Breitkat
Breitkat
Pinball Amateur

Nov-23-2009 03:19

Oh, forgot one thing....

OH BEN?!?!

;-D

Elizabeth Christie
Elizabeth Christie
Tireless Tiger

Nov-23-2009 03:59

I second that. You're doing a great job Molly and congrats to all the final contestants!!

Secret_Squirrel
Secret_Squirrel
Safety Officer

Nov-23-2009 05:04

lol well I can't imagine a more diverse range of people actually. There's a mix of long term and new faces, a mix of well known, and seldom seen, there's even a couple in there that until I looked them up I didn't even know they existed. heavy on the ladies, but that'd be ctowns votes I'm sure.

good luck to you all.

turtledove
turtledove
Gopher to the Sleuth Gods

Nov-23-2009 08:59

Heck, I seem to be the only male avatar left! I do feel a tad overwhelmed however, by all these great looking female avatars! I'm sure I will stand out in the Swimsuit Round..hehehe. Thanks for the nomination Anais although I sometimes ask myself what I'm doing here ;-)

Molly Maltese
Molly Maltese
Old Shoe

Nov-23-2009 11:01

*lengthy snicker at turtledoves interesting wording*

Ha, thanks for the kind words, guys. I just hate getting stupidly disgruntled pms. (Or pointless ones, speaking of which. Mr.Purrvh, anyone? XD)
I'm definitely excited about our results! Poor turtledoves the only guy. You'll have to bribe voters extra-hard, the fate and pride of Sleuth mankind rests upon your shoulders.

:D

The Contessa
The Contessa
Old Shoe

Nov-23-2009 13:45

Oh my, I must drop in at the Gumshoe Lounge more often!

How enchanting to be included ;-)

My thanks to dear Androctonus for nominating me, and thank you Molly for dreaming up this delightful diversion!

I must go clean my fans now ... la revedere!

Heimlich VonVictor
Heimlich VonVictor
Vigilante

Nov-23-2009 14:04

The following is best read in a deep Southern Drawl:

Miss Maltese,

As a retired lawyer who has recently come out of retirement, I'm here today to bring about an affirmative action suit against your contest for sexism. This suit alleges that you willfully engaged in practices of misandry against the participants in your contest both in your selection of judges with a partiality to the female figure and you own interjection meant to block many fine young men from being selected. The rejected male participants will be seeking unspecified damages to be determined in a trial by jury.

Either that or I need to stop watching so much Law & Order while I'm sick XD

All joking aside, good luck to all the remaining participants. I'm glad I can finally change my avatar back to an actual lawyer rather than me playing gangster.

Ms Helen
Ms Helen
Con Artist

Nov-23-2009 14:13

Oh wow, I'm in the final. That's come as a huge shock considering how many new gorgeous faces there are about, mine must be looking tired and haggard by now hehe. Thank you for the nomination Elizabeth and thank you judges for not thinking I'm past it.

TD you must be loving being surrounded by lots of women ;)

Molly, as others have said, whenever there has been a contest on Sleuth there has always been at least one person have a grumble and moan for whatever reason. You're not going to please everyone no matter how hard you try, that's just the way life is.

I personally would like to say a very big thank you to you for taking the time to organise this annual beauty pageant. It's these things that keep the community spirit alive so thank you Molly.

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