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Apr-22-2009 18:31

Here's how you do it:
Dear (someone you recently talked to),
I don't really know how to tell you this,(1). I think I realized it (2)(3) and I saw you (4)(5). I'm sure you're (6) enough to understand (7). I'm returning (8) to you, but I'll keep (9) as a memory. You should also know that (10) and (11).
(12),
(Your name)
then tag 10 people

1) What's the color of your shirt?
Blue - I'm in love with your cat
Red - Our affair is over
White - I’m joining the Convent
Black -Our romance is over
Green- yOur socks don't match
Grey - You're a leprechaun
Yellow - I'm selling myself for candy
Pink - Your nostrils are insulting
Brown - The mafia wants you
No shirt - Purple hedgehogs want to destroy you
Other -I dislike your eyelashes

2) Which is your birth month?
January - That night you picked your nose
February -When I quoted Forest Gump
March - When your dwarf bit me
April - When I tripped on peanut butter
May - When I finally changed my underwear
June - When you put cuffs on me
July â€" When I saw the purple monkey
August - When you smacked my ass
September - Last year when you peed your pants
October - When you offered me that crack
November - Yesterday when I ate that cookie
December - When you made that strange noise

3) Which food do you prefer?
Tacos - In your apartment
Chicken- In your car
Pasta - Outside of your office
Hamburgers - Under the bus
Salad â€" As you were eating Kraft Dinner
Lasagna - In your closet
Kebab - With Jean Chrétien
Seafood - In a clown suit
Sandwiches - At the Elton John concert
Pizza - At the mental hospital
Hot dog - Under a street light
Annat- With George Bush and Stephen Harper

4) What's the color of your socks?
Yellow - Ignore
Red - Put whipped cream on
Black - Hit on
Blue - Knock out
Purple - Pour syrup on
White - Carve your initials into
Grey - Pull the clothes off
Brown - bite off
Orange - Castrate
Pink - Pull the pants off of
Barefoot - Sit on
Other - Drive over

*continued below*

Apr-22-2009 18:31

5) What's the color of your underwear?
Black - My boyfriend
White - My father
Grey â€" The Catholic Priest
Brown â€" The Montreal Canadian’s goalie
Purple - My corned beef hash
Red â€" My knee caps
Blue - My salt-beef bucket
Yellow - My illegitimate child in Ghana
Orange - My Blink 182 cd
Pink â€" Your ‘My Little Pony’ collection
Other --The elephant in the corner

6) What do you prefer to watch on TV?
One Tree Hill - Senile
Heroes- Frostbitten
Lost - High
Simpsons- Cowardly
The news - Scarred
American Idol - Masochistic
Family Guy - Open
Top Model - Middle-class
Annat -shamed

7) Your mood right now?
Happy - How awful you are
Sad - How boring you are
Bored - That I get turned on only by garbage men
Angry - That your smell makes me vomit
Depressed â€" That we’re related
Excited - That I may pee my pants
Nervous - The middle-east is planning their revenge on you
Worried - That your Ford sucks
Apathetic - That you need a sex-change
Silly - That I'm allergic to your earlobes
Cuddly - That Santa doesn't exist
Ashamed - That there is no solution to you being a dumb kid
Other - That your driving sucks

8) What's the color of your walls in your bedroom?
White - Your toe ring
Yellow - Your love letters to me
Red - The pictures from Vegas
Black - Your pet rock
Blue - The couch cushions
Green - Your car
Orange - Your false teeth
Brown - Your nose hair clippers
Grey - Our matching snoopy underwear
Purple - Your old New Kids on the Block blanket
Pink - The cut toenails
Other - Your Hannah Montana underwear

9) The first letter of your first name?
A/B - My virginity
C/D - Your photo with the mustache drawn on it
E/F - Your neighbors dog
G/H - The oil tank from your car
I/J - Your left ear
K/L - The results of that blood-sample
M/N - Your glass eye
O/P - My common sense
Q/R - Your mom
S/T - Your collection of butterflies
U/V - Your criminal record
W/X â€" Your sucide note
Y/Z - Your credit cards

*continued again*

Apr-22-2009 18:32

10) The last letter in your last name?
A/B - Love your sweet, sweet ass
C/D - Always will remember the pep talks
E/F -Never will forget that night
G/H â€" Will not tell the authorities that you stole the whale from the backyard.
I/J â€" Mocked you behind your back constantly
K/L - Hate your cooking
M/N - Told in my confession today about the moose poaching
O/P - Told my psychiatrist about the bruises
Q/R - Get sick when I think of your feet
S/T - Haven’t showered in a month
U/V - Will try to forget that you broke my heart
W/X - Always wanted to break your legs
Y/Z â€" am better off without you

11) What do you prefer to drink?
Wine- Our friendship is ruined
Soft drink â€" I’m off to lead a new life as a lemon
Soda â€" I will haunt you when I’m reincarnated as an Eskimo
Milk - The apartment building is on fire
Water â€" I'm scratching my butt as you read this
Ciderâ€" I have a passionate interest for mice
Juice â€" You ruined my attempts at another world war.
Snapple/Vitamin water â€" You should get that embarrassing rash checked out
Hot chocolate â€" Your Cucumber-fetishism is weird
Whiskey - I love Oprah Winfrey
Beer â€" Thanks for the Cocaine
Other â€" you should stop picking your nose

12) To which country would you prefer to go on a vacation?
Thailand â€" Warm tingly sensations
Australia - Greetings to your frog Leonard
France - Love always
Spain - With tears of sadness
China â€" You make me sick
Germany â€" Please don’t hurt me
Japan - Go milk a cow
Greece - Your everlasting enemy
USA - Best of luck on the sex change
Egypt â€" Kiss my butt
England - Go drown yourself

*done ;)*

Apr-22-2009 18:38

Dear EnzymeRage,

I don't really know how to tell you this, but I’m joining the Convent. I think I realized it when I saw the purple monkey in your closet and I saw you sit on the elephant in the corner. I'm sure you're scarred enough to understand that I get turned on only by garbage men. I'm returning the couch cushions to you, but I'll keep my virginity as a memory. You should also know that I told in my confession today about the moose poaching and your Cucumber-fetishism is weird.

Your Cucumber-fetishism is weird,

Anais
(Your name)

Apr-22-2009 22:45

((( LOL, i was cracking up as I did this. funny!)))

Dear ctown28,

Our affair is over. I think I realized it when you smacked my ass in your apartment and I saw you carve your initials into the elephant in the corner. I'm sure you're mascochistic enough to to understand how awful you are to you, but I'll keep your glass eye as a memory. You should also know that I will never forget that night and thanks for the cocaine.

Greetings to your frog, Leonard,

Mak

Apr-22-2009 23:08

((Cucumber fetish? I would like to hear more... ;-) ))

Dear Huglover,

I really don't know how to tell you this, but I dislike your eyelashes. I think I realized it that night you picked your nose outside your office and I saw you carve your initials into my father. I'm sure you're scarred enough to understand that you need a sex-change. I'm returning your nose-hair clippers to you, but I'll keep my virginity as a memory. I also want you to know that I will not tell the authorities that you stole the whale from the backyard, and the apartment building is on fire.

Go drown yourself,
Acemaster

LOL LOL LOL!!!

Apr-23-2009 04:04

Dear Anikka,

I don't really know how to tell you this but I'm in love with your cat. I think I realised it when I finally changed my underwear outside of your office and I saw you pour syrup on your My Little Pony collection. I'm sure you're open enough to understand that your driving sucks. I'm returning your Hannah Montana underwear to you, but I'll keep your neighbour's dog as a memory. You should also know that I have't showered in a month and you should stop picking your nose.

Go milk a cow

Ms helen

Apr-23-2009 09:45

Dear Ms Helen,

I don't really know how to tell you this, but our affair is over. I think I realized it when I saw the purple monkey at the mental hospital and I saw you sit on the elephant in the corner. I'm sure you're cowardly enough to understand that I'm allergic to your earlobes. I'm returning your car to you, but I'll keep the results of that blood sample as a memory. You should also know that I've always wanted to break your legs and I'm scratching my butt as you read this.

You make me sick,

Anikka

Apr-23-2009 17:26

Dear Joey "Bulldog" Bane,
I don't really know how to tell you this,Purple hedgehogs want to destroy you. I think I realized it when I saw the purple monkey in a clown suit and I saw you knock out the elephant in the corner. I'm sure you're open enough to understand that your smell makes me vomit. I'm returning your love letters to me to you, but I'll keep the results of that blood sample as a memory. You should also know that I love your sweet, sweet ass and I will haunt you when I am reincarnated as an Eskimo.

Greetings to your frog Leonard,

Lolita Marinez

Apr-25-2009 07:39

Dear Makensie Brewer,
I don't really know how to tell you this, Our romance is over. I think I realized it Last year when you peed your pants at the mental hospital and I saw you carve your initials into the catholic priest. I'm sure you're open enough to understand that your driving sucks. I'm returning the couch cushions to you, but I'll keep your photo with the mustache drawn on it as a memory. You should also know that always will remember the pep talks and thanks for the cocaine.

Go drown yourself,
ctown

Apr-27-2010 21:26

Dear Louise Cornwallis,
I don't know how to tell you this, but our romance is over. I think I realized it yesterday when I ate that cookie outside of you office and I saw you sit on the elephant in the corner. I'm sure you're high enough to understand that your driving sucks. I'm returning your toe ring to you, but I'll keep your credit cards as a memory. You should also know that I love you sweet, sweet a** and you should stop picking your nose.

Go drown yourself,

Tagasiyasat