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The quotable...
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crunchpatty
Old Shoe
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Feb-4-2007 23:55
The quotable missus, during the final quarter of the Super Bowl:
"Don't talk to me like I'm stupid, I get it so shut up. This is the last down, and a down is like a chance. If they don't move ten yards in the direction they want to go in four chances they lose possession of the ball. There a four quarters in a game. Stop laughing; you're laughing at me. Shut up. How many downs til they get the new quarterback? Oh that man caught the ball even though he wasn't a Chicago player, now he's running the other way. I think Indianapolis will win this game."
*will let this settle before he complicates things with CFL rules*
heard anything quotable lately?
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crunchpatty
Old Shoe
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Mar-23-2007 23:39
"this" or "his"?
The quotable father-in-law:
"I've had wine and now I'm resting" (he NEVER drinks)
The quotable missus, once again:
Oh look, they're taking their dog for a walk in a wagon (not realizing we were outside a veterinarian's)
The quotable students;
Guy #1 in contradictory team sport gear:
"My vertical leap sucks, yo"
Guy #2 in contradictory team sport gear:
"F'real?"
Guy #1 in contradictory team sport gear:
"F'real. I ain't jumped in like a year."
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crunchpatty
Old Shoe
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Apr-2-2007 00:55
The quotable pregnant medical lab technician:
Her: Here, drink this. Put on these latex gloves first, though.
Me: Why do I need gloves?
Her: It's radioactive. You don't want to get it on your hands. Now drink up!
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Sara Lou
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Apr-4-2007 08:45
Oh god. Today in Science class we are doing and experiment with eggs in vinegar. The shell has totally dissolved, leaving only the egg membrane. Our class's egg is busted.
Shandy: Lord of Llamas and Sara Lou, you made our egg bust! (Of course, Shandy called us by our real names and she was teasing).
LoLlamas: I'm SOOO telekinetic. Darn.
Shandy: WHAT?!?!
LoL:Telekinetic. I have telekinesis.
Shandy (to me) : I'm telekenis! (rubs her head like a psychic does a crystal ball).
Sara lou: *laughs hysterically* *tells LoL*
LoL: *laughs hysterically with me*
Good god, the nutty kids these days!!
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bam_punk
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Apr-4-2007 17:06
Me and me friends
¤¤¤¤¤
Me: (to Erin) Hi, Erin!....I kicked you! Hahaha.
Erin: (happily) Hi, Jenna!
Me: (to Ryan) You know what, I'll kick you too.
Ryan: (in a strange voice) NO, JENNA! DON'T KICK ME!!!
¤¤¤¤¤
I don't know, I just wanted to post something so I posted this.... weird thingy.
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bam_punk
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Apr-4-2007 17:07
^happened today after school^
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crunchpatty
Old Shoe
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Apr-21-2007 02:07
okay. http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/ is more what I'm looking for though.
Stoned grocery stockboy #1: Hey, should I put these sandwiches with the other sandwiches?
Stoned grocery stockboy #2: Look at what's in your hands. That's mexican dip you idiot! Ain't even no bread.
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Anikka
Babelfish
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Apr-21-2007 10:44
Overheard in Crunchpatty's little home office: (yes, it's bugged)
*loud snickers and giggles*
This'll be so great! I'll post about two stoned stockboys...
*more giggles*
...and they'll never know that Stoned stockboy #1 was me!!!!
*more giggles, some coughing, and a gurgle*
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crunchpatty
Old Shoe
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May-17-2007 23:26
OK for the record I have never been a stoned stockboy.
Stoned barista? Sure. Stoned student? Yuh-huhbsolutely. Stoned 7-11 iced cream thief? lol, duuuuuude, 7+ 11 TOTALLY makes 18, and that TOTALLY rhymes with iced cream.
Whoa. Did you just, like, jingle your keys, or is that a siren I hear?
The quotable Mormons on their rite-of-passage mission on the subway:
Elder Harris (aka crew cut guy#1): Hello miss. We're here to spread the new gospel of Jesus Christ. We'd like to come to your home to do a presentation about what accepting the Lord can do for your family. Do you go to church at all?
Asian (ethnicity is relevant here) woman: *Blank stare*.
Elder Johannsen: Do you go to a Chinese church?
Asian woman: *dirty look*
Elder Harris: *speaking very slowly* Do...you..speak...eng...lish? Our church has lots of Chinese members in Toronto; we can arrange for the presentation to be in Chinese. Do you speak Mandarin or Cantonese?
Asian woman: I'm Korean you a**hole.
BURN!
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Jonny
Well-Connected
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Jun-8-2007 11:50
My quotable brother on the subject to TV:
"Before they had colour TV's, was everyone in black and white?"
The scariest thing is he's just finished school...
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Ms Helen
Con Artist
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Jun-8-2007 13:36
The quotable 'likes to think he knows it all' chef from where i used to work:
Me: We have a vegan in Jon, what can you do for her?
Jon: Does it have to come from the vegetarian menu or can she have meat?
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