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Confess, ye sleuthy sinners!
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crunchpatty
crunchpatty
Old Shoe

Nov-16-2006 00:47

Sooo...the mighty gumshoe board feels a bit slow today. *Bob the Builder voice* Can we fix it? Yes we can!

Got a skeleton pounding on your closet? A secret in the attic? A monkey (no, not precious Bobo...and not the raging back hair you try to pass off as a Bonobo backpack either) on your back?

Let it all out, boo.

K, I'll start with a few (true) examples.

When I was 16, I robbed the house belonging to to heir of a pickle dynasty.

I used to steal Volkswagen signs to be more like one of the Beastie Boys.

I have bought more than one kind of deodorant in the same day, on the advice of a friend.

I salivate a little whenever I walk by a hot dog vendor.

I totally car-megeddoned a pigeon last month.

Sometimes, I find Bob Sagat funny.

I'm Canadian and I really don't care about hockey.

Plus, I covet my neighbor's ox every day.

Speak!!!



Replies

Secret_Squirrel
Secret_Squirrel
Safety Officer

Dec-7-2006 04:58

Don't forget Larry Boy Em! he is Larry the Cucumber's crime-fighting super-hero alter ego. He has super suction cup ears!! What more could you want. I bought a friend the Veggietales Nativity Set for Christmas :)

what'syourname
what'syourname

Dec-7-2006 08:26

aww. Crunchpatty you are in good company.. I watched the whole season of America's Next Top Model.. I too am glad Melrose didn't win.. was hoping on of the twins would win though.

I also watch The Biggest Loser!! Love that show.. Now if only i would use thier example and loose some of this weight.

MamaTerra
MamaTerra
Assistant Postman

Dec-9-2006 08:41

Larry Boy rocks.

I'm 24 and addicted to Harry Potter. Which seems almost sad cause it's a children's book. But not as sad as my 26 yr old husband, who is a "MAN'S MAN" being addicted to it as well. :P

I'm terrified of the dark. I have a nightlight.

I like spinach.

I love trashy romance novels, I own about 300.

I've been known to occasionaly read slash fanfiction.

I've written fanfiction. About Harry Potter.

crunchpatty
crunchpatty
Old Shoe

Dec-22-2006 01:48

I will physically defend the remote control against my wife/spousal equivalent's weird little Julia Roberts fixation so vigorously it makes me worry some of y'all are gonna see me on an episode of 'Cops' one day and be all like "Dang...is that that crotchpatty guy?"

Also, I'm seriously only awake right now because I'm waiting to feed these virtual aquarium fish I kinda started virtually breeding today.

Apparently one of them has a problem with tail fungus.

biggie528
biggie528
Lucky Stiff

Dec-22-2006 09:25

At least you already have the mullet wig and Coors Lite t-shirt. Just remember, you get more camera time if you rip the t-shirt off in the midst of the cops wrassling you to the ground.

No I don't speak from experience.....

crunchpatty
crunchpatty
Old Shoe

Jan-22-2007 23:53

"you get more camera time if you rip the t-shirt off in the midst of the cops wrassling you to the ground"
-------------

especially if the good people at Nair happen to be sponsoring that episode :P

okay so just a few moments ago, I doubled up on my cholesterol medication SIMPLY because I'm getting my blood tested tomorrow. And i'm thinking about going for round three, just cause I can't face the shame of seeing the word "delicious" in the same sentence as "blood" in the test results.

crunchpatty
crunchpatty
Old Shoe

Feb-19-2007 22:15

*knows you have something to confess voice*

Every time I get a suspect called "Humphrey" in the daily course of my detectiveish little workaday, I shorten it to "Hump" before I write it down. Then I giggle a little in my head and tell myself that if anyone ever asks me why, I can just write it off to carpal tunnel syndrome.
----

I will taste pretty much anything on a dare.
----

Also, I lie to people sometimes and tell them I think their baby is really cute, when in reality what I want to say is that it looks like it was made from Plasticine and then rolled, head down, in a sack of mascara and Cocker Spaniel fur.

cenoecox
cenoecox
Well-Connected

Feb-20-2007 13:38

I can't lie to people about their fugly babies. I will cut them off mid-question, and walk away. Hump is one of my FAVORITE words in the whole world, and I use it in a sentence as often as possible. I will taste pretty much anything just because I like to eat stuff. Hmmm...... I sniff my armpits a couple times a day, all OCD-style no matter where I am or who I'm around. I like to go sing karaoke, and when no one expects it, I insert the f-word into the song. Once I gave my grandma a couple of Anne Rice's super, extra, dirty nasty sex books to read on accident. Then pretended they were my Mom's. :)

bam_punk
bam_punk

Feb-20-2007 19:51

I am 12 yrs old.
I never watch scary movies.
I have a million stuffed animals.
When I see a moron on the T.V., I throw something at the television.
I am obsessed with Nancy Drew.
All my friends are weirdos like me.
I like to read.
Some People call me Goth and I'm not.
I am nancycat on herinteractive.
I dance weird.

bam_punk
bam_punk

Feb-20-2007 19:52

Oh yeah, and a strange person has a crush on me.

Now you know "all" of my secrets.....

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