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crunchpatty
crunchpatty
Old Shoe

Aug-30-2006 01:51

I heart stupidity. When you see it, post it here. I'll start.

Some of you know that I've do some teaching of first year sociology students in university. I really enjoy it, and love my students, but -GAWD- grading their work is a nightmare.

Through the course of a year, they have to write short essays on a range of topics ---feminism, Karl Marx, education, Freud, crime, etc. I feel kinda guilty laughing at these because of course they are writing under extreme pressure, but holy bobo I find them funny! Every so often, they write something so frickin' hysterical that it makes me gag laughing. These fleeting gems, I collect. Thought y'all might get a kick out of some of them.

Here we go. (nb, all typos and grammar boo boos are theirs from here on, not mine)

"Education is not really as old as many people think. It all came about in
the 1960s when the Russians were more advanced with outerspace."

"There is no evidence of women in society until the late 1990s"

"Freud is the classic theory of gender he believes the boy has the penis the girl has the clitoris simple as that"

"Freud said that a boy who plays too many dolls might be a p_ssy in later life"

"Feminists think women are the lowest of the low"

"Education is bias it only works for children who come from families where the parents are rich white and male"

"Hitlar believed in the destroying the Jews, however, his dictation only lasted until he was alive, after it was forgotten."

"Weber saw society from his eyes"

"someone from the low class is no good to us. we don't see them as nonsuccessful. That is because of sociology"

"Max Weber is a known and accredited sociologist"

"All around us in our society it is, said to be all around us these 'bureacracy' for example God is higher than Jeesus. The boss."



Replies

crunchpatty
crunchpatty
Old Shoe

Oct-3-2006 10:47

Actual excerpts from cover letters sent by job-seekers and clients to a Chicago-area advertising firm:

"It is my desire to develop and generate the revolving scheme to filter the consuming public in."

"Today is the first day of my life. I am terrified of the all-out approach I sense in my spirit. However I am not scared enough to let it stop me. I will sacrifice anything but my God (morals) and my family."

"Originally from Vietnam, I also offer experience in the following areas: Asian cuisine: I deliver in-box or out-of-the-box; traditional massage: I satisfy Client above their expectation; Karaoke singing: but also a lot of listening, listening and listening to Client. Would you like to taste any of those?"

"I want to obtain a deeper understanding of how Advertising firms."

"At school he is a student of advertising, on the streets of Chicago he is a student of culture and memes. This is Advertising, finding that elusive why. Charles understands the nuances of culture...He is all of us and one of us, he is the Cultural Chameleon."

"Who's better to spew out incite, than a college senior?"

"Looking for a creative person for your team? Deep studies on movies. Prepared for the totally unexpected advertising and Selling Blasting."

"I want to expose my creative ideas for a good agency not just that the agency is good rather to build a image of quality. Thus I am offering you this small note of request to give me a break by providing projects of
a. Creating concept TV commercials.
b. Print media
c. Hoarding"

"Hi; I'm from Ukraine, and very interesting about profi advertisement. I have some interesting and absolutely new ideas (for example about car brands) but in our f---ing (sorry) country its unreal to do own business. May be you want to work with us? Its will be really good."
-----

(swear I've seen some of those on the recruiting thread before...)



Autumnsprings
Autumnsprings
Con Artist

Oct-6-2006 00:25

http://www.dumb.com/productwarnings.htm

no description needed.

onenanna
onenanna

Oct-7-2006 10:13

Here are a few "duhs" from high school students writing a short essay using analogies.

He spoke with wisdom that can only come from experience, like a Guy who went blind because he looked at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it and now goes around the country speaking at high schools about
dangers of looking at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole
in it.

The hailstones leaped from the pavement, just like maggots when you fry them in hot grease.


Long separated by cruel fate, star-crossed lovers raced across the grassy field
toward each other like two freight trains, one having left Cleveland at 6:36
p.m. traveling at 55 mph, the other from Topeka at 4:19 p.m. at a speed of 35
mph.

Snake 7
Snake 7

Oct-7-2006 15:50

me.


lol!

I looked at the product warnings and they were hilarious! Thanks
Autumnsprings!!

crunchpatty
crunchpatty
Old Shoe

Oct-24-2006 01:19

OK, so checkity-check it: done grading the first round of mid-terms and you know what that means...yes yes y'all - more STUPID!

The main course of this here stupid-du-jour comes in 'random utterance' format-- my comments in brackets.

"Latipso's are like hospitals except they are much more intense. Also because maidens were the supposed healers, whereas even the husband's wife hasn't seen him naked or performed any intercourse-related actions"

"if you take a blond black person and surround them in a society of white people where white people disliked black people the black person if he was never told he was black would also grow to dislike white people." --(But only if he was blond?)

"Usually [class struggle] will end by revolutionitation"

"Back then, in the present..." (ahh, famous first words)

"It is no surprise that a baby girl gets his/her genes from his/her parents" (If it's on the "his" end of things, it's probably pretty shocking to someone!)

"If enough students decided that they shouldn't have to sit in chairs in class, maybe they preferred to lay down in tiny beds, they could band together and force change" (Kum-bayaaah, m'lord...)

For dessert, we need Q&A:

Q: Sign your name on the first page of the exam.
A: D!

Q: Would the authors agree that female sociologists were invisible in early sociology?
A: They would agree. The women were whipped out!

A.1: No, because over the years, many women writers have been so famous and so recognized that they've managed to outsell so many male writers, including Charels Dickenson"

Q: Why did the author that in one way, Helen Keller was not fully human when she was a child? (They had read someone who was arguing that language and communication capacities were what make humans, 'human')

A: Because Helen Keller did not have the ability to think straight.

A.1: Because she was still only a fetus and developing.

(trumpet noise)

A.2: Helen Keller is a squeegee kid because she doesn't behave as other kids.


crunchpatty
crunchpatty
Old Shoe

Oct-24-2006 01:52

*fries the maggot of ignorance in the smoking-hot, star-crossed grease of inborn stupidity for onenanna and TOTALLY brings all this up at the next union meeting*

Secret_Squirrel
Secret_Squirrel
Safety Officer

Oct-24-2006 02:16

You just know the kid who beleives in revolutionitation is going to emigrate and become the President of the good old U S of A. Though having tried to type said word, and resorted to cutting and pasting, maybe the kid deserved kudos after all.

biggie528
biggie528
Lucky Stiff

Oct-24-2006 09:11

ROFL

kcoenich8
kcoenich8

Nov-3-2006 19:47


what I saw in the local news... a pair of theifs gets in a bus to assault it...
in the act, drives thru a police car and all the bus passengers shout at the cops...
the cops stop their car a run to the assaulted bus, the two theifs get scared, one of them runs away... the other one, didnĀ“t know what to do, so he sits on the bus,
pretending he is a passenger... pretty smart eh?

Ravenclaw15
Ravenclaw15

Nov-3-2006 20:22

Sometimes my roommate frightens me. The other day, she suggested I borrow one of her books with this reccomendation: "It's so scary! And it's a completely true story, so that makes it even more scary!!"

This book was actaully "My Life At Rose Red," the cheesy ghost story about a man-eating mansion. The book was also made into a movie by Stephen King, and features voodoo priestesses, swirling vortexes to the underworld, and the standard Indian burial ground underneath the house.
In one scene, previously harmelss plants in a greenhouse wrap their vines around a police officer and eat him alive, leaving only a belt behind.

I tried to break it to my roommate that this was a work of fiction, kind of a poor man's Blair Witch. She didn't believe me, and I was forced to show her several web sites explaining that this is not a true story.

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